Revenant
by CitiKitti
Summary: Co-written with my Moony (yes, really!)Post-veil, possibly AU, rated R for later chapters. Trust me on that. WIP
1. Default Chapter

REVENANT

By Moony & Padfoot

**Chapter One**

_A shiver ran across Remus' frame and he could sense rather than see Sirius smile predatorily._

_Slender fingers ran their way down his side, grazing his scar as it went. With another moan he felt the silky slide of tongue follow it down, caressing the scar lovingly._

God, this is love.

_Remus felt his whole body tighten. He felt hot and feverish. He twisted his fingers into Sirius' long black hair and brought him roughly back up to his mouth._

_Tongues teased, tempted and twisted, loving and adoring the other._

_Sirius' hands ran down his back once more, then slid their way down his jeans and cupped his backside, pulling him against Sirius where they both became aware how aroused the other was._

_All of a sudden, Remus felt cold again._

"Sirius?"

Remus opened his eyes suddenly, hands reaching out to find Sirius' comforting warmth, but all he was met with was the usual cold sheets.

Memories tumbled over him, threatening to suffocate him, pull him under into their murky depths as they had been every day for the past two years.

Taking a deep shuddering breath, Remus reached for the bottle on his bedside table, swearing profusely to find it empty.

He sat up, wincing as the sunlight of the beautiful day outside made its way through the thin curtains covering his window. He tossed the empty bottle into the wastebasket nearby, hearing the clink as it met the other bottles already in there.

Remus ran a hand through his hair, forcing back the last shreds of his dream.

He made his way to the bathroom and turned the shower on full blast. He stepped under the jet only to be greeted with icy cold water. With another curse he stumbled back out again, turning off the shower and grabbing at the nearest towel.

He pulled on a tattered robe and went to the kitchen, rubbing at his hair. Then he heard a knocking at his door.

_Who the hell is that?_

Remus pulled open the door with every intention of turning away the unwanted visitor when he suddenly realized who it was.

"Tonks! What..."

Tonks had her arms full, two paper bags balanced precariously and she nudged the door open with a hip.

"Thought you could do with some breakfast, Re." She smiled brightly, and then actually looked at Remus. "God, man! What have you done to yourself??"

She placed the bags onto the old table and turned to scrutinize him more closely. Remus didn't really care what she thought of how he looked, though he knew it must be pretty terrible. He hadn't shaven in at least a week, he hadn't slept since who knew when, and today was the first day in about three that he had ventured into the shower.

Tonks continued to look him over for several more moments until Remus began to get annoyed.

"What do you want?" His voice was raspy. He hadn't used it in so long, and he hadn't meant to be rude. Tonks seemed not to have noticed anyway.

"I thought you might be hungry." She smiled brightly again as she began emptying the contents of the bags onto the table. There was a container of orange juice, a loaf of bread, a small bag of fresh rolls and assorted condiments to go with it.

Her hands brushed against the stack of letters that had been piled nearby and they fluttered to the floor. Most seemed to be bills.

"Oops, sorry. I'll get them." She bent and started picking them up, and Remus didn't miss the flash of concern that crossed her face.

"Re..."

Remus winced. "Don't call me that."

Tonks blushed, pulling out a chair and sitting down. Reluctantly, and out of pure habit, he sat opposite her.

"Tonks..." Remus was relieved his voice was slightly less harsh. "Why are you here?"

Tonks looked down at her hands, the nails painted a lurid purple to match her shoulder length hair.

"We're all worried, Remus."

"Worried?"

"About you!"

Remus stood back up in disgust, filling the kettle with water and tapping it with his wand.

"Remus, it's been two years...you...you should start getting out..."

Remus had heard it all before. None of them understood.

In those first few weeks he had had to force himself to do simple things like eat and breathe. Every breath had been a punishment to him. Why should he still be alive when...

"I'm fine."

He turned with two cups of tea in his hands. He placed one in front of Tonks but stood with his.

Tonks was fidgeting nervously. It only took a few minutes for her to spill her drink.

"Shit! I'm sorry."

Remus grabbed her hand before she could try to mop up the mess.

A definite blush crept to her cheeks.

Remus knew she fancied him. Had done for a while now. Once every month or so she, someone else from the Order, would come and visit him out here, in his old cottage, encouraging him to talk, trying to get him out of the place.

"Tonks...I appreciate you keeping an eye on me, I do...but I just want to be alone."

Tonks sighed, nodding slowly. "I know it will take time...but one day you will have to accept he's not coming back."

Anger flashed in Remus' eyes and he strode over to the door, opening it roughly. "You can tell Dumbledore I don't need a babysitter. Tell _all_ of them to leave me the fuck alone!"

Tonks gulped, clearly aware she had overstepped the unspoken boundary. Muttering another apology, she turned and raced outside, Disapparating when she was only a few yards away.

Remus slammed the door shut, grabbed another bottle from his cupboard and flung himself onto the old sofa in the living room.

It only took a few sips for him to begin to relax, a few more for him to imagine Sirius standing before him once more.

A few more still and he imagined he heard the sweet whispered words of love.

He closed his eyes and drifted back into an uneasy sleep, the truth forgotten once more, at least for now.

"Come on!" Sirius yelled at the Death Eater, easily ducking the Stunning spell thrown at him. How can she be my cousin with such awful aim? "You can do better than that!"

And then she did.

The second Stunner hit him square in the chest, knocking him partially off balance.

_What the -- ? Oh fuck!_

He reeled backwards through the stone archway, the tattered remnants of veil brushing lightly over his face as he arched through it.

... _dark ..._

... _cold ..._

... _nothing no sound no sight no nothing oh god ..._

... _so cold so cold it hurts oh god oh fuck it hurts ..._

The intense cold lanced through his limbs, arcing them with sickening pain as the Stunning spell wore off. He closed his eyes reflexively as he flailed around helplessly in the utter blackness.

There didn't seem to be anything immediately around him – at least he hadn't yet hit anything – and when he reached down he could not tell whether beneath his feet lay wood or stone or water or nothing at all.

_Where am I? Oh gods, what is this place? What spell is this?_

In sheer panic, he threw his arms about wildly, eyes still clamped tightly shut, muttering incoherently under his breath.

Something skittered across the back of one hand.

With a wordless cry, he recoiled, then screamed in absolute terror as his other hand scraped painfully against cold stone.

_The archway?_

Sick with fright, he reached blindly forward until his outstretched fingertips touched the ragged edge of the veil. It was like touching arctic ice, the cold so fierce it burned.

Gritting his teeth and not allowing himself a spare moment to think, he threw himself forwards through the veil, through that bitter cold that swept over him for the most excruciating two seconds of his life.

And then it was over, he was through, and there was a stone floor under his feet that caused him to stumble awkwardly, and the air, oh gods, the air was so blessedly warm and –

... _it's so quiet ..._

He cracked one eye cautiously open.

Slowly he turned full circle, noting in a rather detached manner the dust on the stone benches, the archway behind him with the fluttering shreds of veil.

Empty.

The room was utterly empty, save for him.

_Where did they go? The battle – Bellatrix – Harry – the Death Eaters – the Order – where **is** everyone?_

There was a door on the far side of the room.

As he stood there, disbelief etched in every line of his face and wondering if somehow he'd also somehow been hit with a Confundus Charm, the door slowly opened, and a tall black man in wizard's robes edged through it. His arms were full of rolls of parchment, and he did not immediately notice Sirius standing bewildered in the middle of the room.

_I know him!_ "Kingsley!" Sirius shouted.

The other wizard gaped at Sirius, the parchment falling every which way, his mouth hanging open in shock. He pointed a trembling finger at Sirius.

"You... you..." he began.

"Kingsley, listen," said Sirius urgently, striding towards him. "Where's the battle? Is Harry still alright? I saw Tonks fall; is she okay? Where's Remus? What's going on? _Why are you staring at me like that?_"

"You're... you're _here_?" Kingsley whispered. "You... you came _back_?"

Sirius stared at him. "Kingsley... I've been gone, what? Ten, fifteen minutes? Half an hour, tops. Bellatrix got me with a Stunner, of all things. Never knew she had such good aim. But never mind... There's a _battle_ on, Kingsley. I'm trying to _help_!"

Kingsley shook his head. "The battle... It's _over_, Sirius. It's been over... for..." He snapped his mouth closed, clearly unwilling to say more.

"What?" yelled Sirius. "I _missed_ it? I missed _everything?_ Are you telling me I missed the whole thing?"

"Stay here!" Kingsley barked at him, stepping back towards the door. He rubbed his hands absently over his face. "Don't... don't go _anywhere_. I'll be right back. Have to... notify... certain parties..." He turned and rushed back through the door, leaving his rolls of parchment forgotten on the floor.

"Bloody hell," growled Sirius, sinking to the floor. "I can't believe I missed it all."

The firelight flickered on the darkened walls, highlighting the hair of the man lying on the sofa, eyes reflecting the golden flames.

Remus watched the fiery dance, his eyes occasionally glancing at the moon outside, its roundness calling him.

_Only one more night..._

He would almost laugh at the irony of him now looking forward to his changes if he could remember how, but that emotion, like so many others, had been buried deep inside.

As a werewolf, he could almost forget the constant pain, the constant empty ache that followed him around as a man.

Sirius...and he pushed back a sob at the name...had been his life mate. The only one he would - _could_, he corrected himself - ever love. They had had a bond, so deep, so strong that it was almost impossible to live without the other.

Remus had felt the sudden shoot of pain the instant Sirius had gone through that veil, but had been unable to act on it. Indeed he had been unable to accept what had happened. Only when he had returned to Grimmauld place, had fought off those wanting to speak to him and retreated to bed, could he allow himself to realize what had just transpired.

Within a few heartbeats he had begun to sob, his entire body began to ache...

It had taken the entire first year to learn to push the pain into the far recesses of his mind. Once he had controlled the pain the anger had started.

He was angry at Sirius for leaving him, angry at everyone else for living, angry at himself for not being able to save him...

_Tomorrow...I can forget again, for a while..._

The last time Remus and Sirius had been in this old cottage it had been summer. Sirius had been amused at Remus' habit of having the fire going, even on the hottest day.

_How he would love to see it now...how the fire warms you..._

Before the sob could fully form in his throat he was washing it away with his firewhisky. His eyelids drooped and he was soon asleep, a whispered name on his lips, soft as a psalm.

He woke to an insistent tapping on his window.

At first he thought it was a branch, as the wind had picked up during the night. But it grew more and more frantic until Remus finally sat up.

"Who the hell is that now?" he growled to himself, and was about to shout something loud and rude when he noticed the owl.

Rubbing the sleep from his eyes and trying to shake the after effects of the whisky, he undid the latch and pulled the window up.

The dust-coloured owl hopped into the room and perched on the back on the sofa, waiting patiently as Remus fumbled to untie the message. As soon as he had it, the owl took off with a small hoot.

Remus recognized Dumbledore's handwriting immediately and frowned.

Dumbledore had been asking him for the past year now to come back and teach, and every single time Remus had sent a polite reply declining the offer.

He held the letter for a few moments before tossing it onto his desk. He could read it another day.

Remus ran a hand through his tousled hair, debating whether it was worth his effort to shower and dress today. Deciding against it, he lay back down on the sofa. Tonight he would get relief from the pain, if only for a few hours...

_Why do I bother going on at all..._

He hung his head, pondering for the millionth time just following his life mate into the void through the veil. Then he glanced up and noticed the dying embers in the hearth.

"You and me are a lot alike," he said to the fireplace. "We both began full of bright promise and are both now too tired to go on..."

Still he grabbed a log from the box nearby and tossed it onto the embers, watching as the log began to smoke then burst into flame.

"Perhaps there is hope somewhere...but I doubt it."

_This is ridiculous_, Sirius thought angrily_. I've got to find out where everyone is! They wouldn't have just... left me... would they?_

He couldn't sit still, couldn't stop pacing in tight circles. Abruptly he decided to follow Kingsley, conveniently ignoring his instructions to remain.

Racking his memory, he muttered a spell that would illuminate the path of the last person to leave a room – or so he hoped. He hadn't used it since his schooldays, but apparently it still worked as he remembered.

Ghostly blue footprints appeared right where Kingsley had been standing, motionless for a moment and then edging towards the door. Clutching his wand tightly in one hand, Sirius crept warily through the door, eyes roving wildly for any remaining Death Eaters.

_I don't care what he said – there is just no way the battle could have been over this quickly._

There was no one in sight.

He hurried after the rapidly disappearing footprints as they continued out of the Department of Mysteries, through twisting corridors until Sirius recognized the main hallway of the Ministry of Magic.

Which, somehow, was completely deserted.

_This is just too weird..._

_Where is everyone?_

Ignoring the footprints which veered off down another corridor, he headed cautiously towards the lift, constantly turning in circles, wand outstretched. His nerves were impossibly taut. Something was very, very wrong here... and Sirius fully intended to find out exactly what it was.

He reached street level without incident, which unnerved him even more.

Must've gone back to Headquarters... 

Ducking around a corner, he quickly Disapparated back to Grimmauld Place.

_This bloody house never changes_, Sirius thought grimly, creeping into the house and up the gloomy stairs. He was utterly grateful for the darkness in the hallway. He heard faint sounds from the direction of the kitchen, but decided to ignore them for now.

Taking the stairs two at a time, he hurried to the room he shared with Remus, hauling the door open.

He faltered in the doorway.

A thin layer of dust lay across the furniture. The air was stale and musty, as if no one had breathed in here in a very long time. For a dizzying moment, Sirius thought he'd somehow gotten the wrong room, but no – it was as he remembered it... almost.

Two boxes were stacked by the window, both labeled with his name in Remus' careful handwriting.

He glanced out the window, noting with surprise the full moon that slipped out from behind the clouds.

No... It was just two weeks ago... I'm sure of it... 

Utterly confused, he headed back downstairs towards the kitchen. Obviously someone was here; he had heard voices. The kitchen door hung slightly ajar, a bright wedge of light shining through the slight opening.

He heard Dumbledore's voice first, heavy and sure, then a more muffled female voice – Tonks? – who sounded rather as if she'd been crying.

_Maybe Molly had another run-in with a Boggart_...

"It's _awful_," she sobbed. "If you'd only seen him..."

"My dear girl," said Dumbledore in it eternally reassuring manner, "he has refused my owls for some time now."

"But..." There was a loud sniffle, followed almost immediately by the unmistakable sound of a teacup crashing to the floor.

_Tonks, then_, thought Sirius, grinning.

"I'm so _sorry_!" Tonks cried. "I've been so jumpy since I saw Remus at the cottage!"

_Remus? At the cottage? What?_ Sirius furrowed his brow, feeling more and more sure that he'd somehow been Confunded. He was getting a cramp in his knees from keeping so still behind the kitchen door, too. _But we live here now... Would he have gone back for something?_

He shook his head vigorously, trying to clear the cobwebs from his brain.

"How did he seem this time?" Dumbledore asked patiently as Tonks blew her nose.

She sighed heavily before answering. "_Dead_, that's how," she said so quietly that Sirius nearly didn't hear her at all. "I've never _seen_ someone look so dead..."

Shocked beyond words, Sirius backed away from the door, stumbling over an umbrella stand. He ducked into the shadows as it crashed to the floor.

The kitchen door was flung open as Tonks rushed into the hall, wand at the ready. She stopped, staring around in disbelief.

"Is someone here?" she said cautiously. "Hello?"

Dumbledore appeared behind her, a small piece of parchment in his hand. "Kingsley has just owled me," he said, his voice grave. "It appears that..."

Sirius stepped out from behind the door.

Tonks screamed.

"Ah, Sirius!" Dumbledore said, smiling broadly. "I've been wondering when we'd see you again."

Sirius glared at Tonks. "You said... I heard you... Remus is dead?"

"No, you misunderstand..." she began, but it was too late. Sirius had already Disapparated.

Tonks whirled around to face Dumbledore. "We have to go after him!"

Dumbledore shook his head. "Not yet. I think you'll find Sirius to be the one thing that will bring young Mister Lupin back to life again, as it were."

The cottage, too, was utterly deserted.

_Doesn't surprise me_, Sirius thought grimly. "Remus?" he yelled. "I know you're here! Answer me!"

Don't be dead, don't be dead, please don't be... 

He tore through the few rooms, screaming Remus' name, but there was no answer.

_The woods! The moon!_ He rushed out of the cottage, changing to his canine form halfway across the clearing, bounding into the forest. Remus had once put a heavy chain in a certain meadow to constrain himself so he could gaze at the moonlit sky on summer nights.

It was gone.

Warily he switched back to human form. Was this even the right meadow? Yes, there was the axe wedged deep into a tree stump, a pile of logs to one side waiting to be cut.

_Funny, I don't remember there being rust on that axe blade..._

Completely baffled, he began the slow trek back to the cottage.

_Unless Tonks... unless she was right... and he really... he really is..._

_No! I refuse to believe that!_

Sirius raced headlong through the underbrush, mindless of the branches scratching his face and arms as he raced back to the cottage.

Hurtling through the door, he began frantically searching the rooms again, calling for his lover over and over, until his voice was broken and hoarse with dry sobs.

He sank finally to his knees by the bedroom window, burying his face in his hands, weeping furiously.

_Damnit, Remus... How could you leave me? A few hours ago, everything was fine... and now... How could you just leave me like this?_


	2. Revenant Ch2

**Chapter Two**

The werewolf lifted its head slightly, listening.

Something had disturbed its sleep.

There was something..._different_ in the air.

A scent?

A sound?

His muzzle disturbed the dust around him, blowing it in tiny clouds around his face.

It was almost dawn.

Was that the reason he felt so uneasy?

Human thought began to invade, began to wash away the blissful night of not caring, not feeling.

Remus rolled onto his back, gazing at the cellar ceiling above him. The sky outside was slowly growing lighter.

He was tired. He hadn't slept.

Something was definitely different...

Then Remus noticed the dull ache that had haunted him for two years had gone.

_Is that it then? Am I to forget him so easily?_

He sat up, tasting dry blood on his mouth, and tentatively touched the gash on his cheek.

_Just another scar for the collection._

Remus slowly tested the rest of his body, satisfied there was nothing seriously wrong with him, and then stood shakily.

For the first time since who knew when he was hungry.

Ravenous, actually.

Guilt flooded him, thinking of how suddenly he felt good, _normal_. Though he was still haunted by his deep sadness, it was much more bearable.

He made the slow climb out of the cellar, unlocking it then hauling himself into the kitchen.

He stretched his thin limbs. Nothing broken this time, but quite a few new gashes. One on his forearm in particular was bleeding profusely.

Remus grabbed a tea towel, wrapping it around his arm, as he awkwardly turned on the kettle.

Even his need for firewhisky had diminished...but not that much.

He grabbed a bottle from the cupboard and took a quick gulp to help deaden the pain of his wounds.

He shivered slightly. He was naked and covered in dust.

Still, he was too tired to do much about it.

He started the fire once more, pulled on his old robe and settled onto the sofa to watch the sun rise fully, bottle still in hand, though he no longer felt to uncontrollable urge to drink from it. Still, he took several more gulps, more from habit than need.

After a few minutes he began to feel the pleasant buzz of the beginnings of oblivion.

He knew he must look awful, his body thinner than it had ever been, unshaven, unwashed, and now complete with several cuts and scratches.

What did he care? Who did he have to look presentable for?

His eyes were just beginning to slip closed when he heard movement in the cottage.

Suddenly fully alert, he rummaged in his desk for his wand, standing to face the door, pushing back the slight feeling of dizziness from the alcohol and slight loss of blood.

There were definite footsteps making their way up the hallway towards the living room.

Slow, even steps.

Remus gripped his wand more tightly, blinking his eyes furiously to quell the nausea threatening to overwhelm him.

Then the figure entered the room.

_My God..._

_I'm hallucinating!_

_It's an apparition...can't be real...can't..._

Remus' eyes rolled into the back of his head and he collapsed heavily onto the floor.

He'd fallen asleep there, huddled in the corner by the bedroom window, but his sleep was anything but restful.

He awoke at dawn, his body aching abominably from being curled up on the cold floor for several hours.

Stretching awkwardly, Sirius shuffled slowly into the bathroom, arms and legs stinging unmercifully as circulation returned to them.

_He's gone_, he thought dully. _Remus is gone._

Over the year Sirius had spent at Grimmauld Place, his body had filled out again, and even his hair was again thick and shiny, only the fewest of grey hairs marring the otherwise black locks. Physically, he was the picture of health, although pale from lack of sun, except for his eyes.

The eyes that stared wildly back from his reflection were as haunted and shadowed as when he'd first left Azkaban.

There was a muffled thump and click from the kitchen.

_Who the fuck...?_

Wand outstretched, he edged out of the bathroom, flattening himself against the wall.

Thump. Muted muttering. No, not the kitchen – the living room now.

Sirius tried to be as noiseless as possible as he strode the length of the hall, but impatience made his footfalls heavier than he'd meant them to be.

He lunged into the living room, _expelliarmus!_ dying on his lips as he stared in utter disbelief at the gaunt figure in front of him.

_Remus? You're not dead?_

For it _was_ Remus, but not as Sirius remembered him.

_You're not dead!_

_Oh – last night – right – full moon – transformation,_ he thought all at once, belatedly recalling that Remus had had a cellar built for these times. Sirius stepped cautiously toward his friend.

And Remus, white with fright and pain, collapsed.

Tenderly Sirius gathered the other man in his arms, heedless of the blood soaking into his clothes. "'S okay," he murmured into Remus' hair. "I'm here. It's okay. I'm sorry, Moony – so bloody sorry I wasn't more help in the battle, but I don't care. I'm here now; I'll take care of you."

Carrying Remus into the bedroom, he laid him carefully on the bed, placing a gentle kiss on the other man's brow before rushing off to find bandages, warm water, and a flannel.

_He hasn't had a transformation so bad since... I dunno... Didn't he take the Wolfsbane?_

Supplies gathered, he gently dipped a soft flannel into the water, bathing away the dust and blood from Remus' exhausted body.

_He's so thin... How could I not have seen this? Where the hell did all these scars come from? He didn't have these... I could swear it..._

A gnawing disquiet settled along his spine. Sirius sat back and surveyed his friend.

_This is Remus... Isn't it? I could swear there wasn't this much grey in his hair before the battle... And these scars. I know I don't remember them, but he's obviously had them for awhile_...

Oh, something is very, very wrong here... 

Sirius shook his head violently clear of all the nagging questions. _I won't wake him. I won't_.

Instead he forced himself to finish bathing and dressing Remus' many wounds, mindful of a particularly nasty gash on one forearm that needed a quick healing spell to close it first. Finally, deciding against pajamas for fear of waking the man, he tucked the blankets around Remus and left the room, closing the door quietly behind him as he went.

He felt utterly drained.

Sighing heavily, he headed back into the living room. The firewhisky bottle had tipped to the floor when Remus had collapsed, and the small room stank of it. Sirius cleaned it up the best he could, but the odour lingered. He cracked open the window a bit for the fresh air, and tried to ignore it.

_Oh hell_, he thought after a few minutes. _Wonder if he's got any more? Ah, it can wait... I'll ask him later._

The small desk was just as cluttered as he remembered it, and he picked up the topmost of a stack of Daily Prophets, some of which were starting to yellow at the edges.

Taking the paper into the kitchen, Sirius threw it on the table while he began rummaging through the cupboards for something edible. He found some stale crackers and dusty teabags, but little else. Wrinkling his nose, he left them alone. In the fridge he fared better – bread, cheese, some juice.

After making a quick sandwich, Sirius made himself comfortable at the battered kitchen table, sitting in one chair with his feet propped up on the other.

He picked up the newspaper, glancing idly at the date.

And froze.

_That... That's just... not possible_...

He flung the Daily Prophet aside in utter horror, sandwich forgotten.

Two years? Two years gone? 

Frantically ransacking the kitchen cupboards again, he happened upon Remus' not-so-secret stash of firewhisky. He grabbed a bottle of it and headed back into the living room.

_Misprint. It was a misprint. Had to be_. His hands began to shake as he pawed through the stack of old newspapers on the desk.

Except, he realized with horrifying certainty, it wasn't.

Remus woke slowly but kept his eyes closed, burrowing further into the pillows. He had been having the most wonderful dream...

Everything had been back to normal. Sirius was there, whispering in his ear, holding him, comforting him.

Remus smiled into his pillow, wanting to hold onto the dream for as long as possible, but the threads of reality started pulling the dream apart.

The pain of his wounds began to throb, causing him to finally open his eyes.

He heard the deep even breathing next to him, became aware of the soft weight of an arm possessively curled over his waist...

As slowly as he could, not daring to think what he would see, he rolled over and came face to face with a mass of silky black hair.

_Has to be a dream...has to be!_

He sat up, inching back from the man asleep on his bed, intent on getting to his wand.

_It's not him. It's an imposter._

_God, he smells so good..._

Remus paused, perched on the end of his bed, the arm now lying across his legs carelessly.

With trembling fingers he reached out to touch the soft dark hair, barely believing it could be real. It was like the finest silk, running through his fingers like tendrils of mist.

More daring, he leaned in to breathe deep of the familiar scent.

_Sirius..._

_He looks just the way he did two years ago._

Still, Remus couldn't bring himself to believe it. It could be a hallucination, it could be...

_Polyjuice Potion! Someone found a hair of his and turned themselves into him to taunt me..._but that theory died as quickly as it was thought.

It just _couldn't_ be possible that it could really be him.

But the bond...his heart felt fuller than it had in years, he felt...alive.

_Oh god..._

With a fluttering heart he bent to softly kiss that smooth brow, lingering to breathe in the familiar scent.

_God, god, god..._

As much as he wanted to stay, as much as he needed to see those eyes open and gaze at him, he needed even more to get away.

He carefully edged the arm off of his legs so he could finally get up, noticing with a small amount of embarrassment that he was naked. Also, he was clean and his wounds had been dressed.

So many emotions were coursing through him and he found he couldn't handle them all at once. His heart was swelling with a cautious joy but he was still scared. More scared than he had been in a long time.

Why was Sirius back? Was it only temporary? Would he be taken away again?

Remus found his robe on the floor beside the bed, pulled it on then went to the kitchen, pausing to grab his wand which had been carefully placed on his bedside table.

He needed a drink, a strong one.

He pulled a bottle of firewhisky from the cupboard, popped the cap and took a huge gulp before sitting at the table to think.

What to do... 

After a few sips his fear began to fade.

The veil...he had clearly seen Sirius fall through it. No-one had ever returned from it before. What had pulled him back? Or thrown him out? Or...

His head hurt from thinking too much and he set the bottle down to massage his temples.

Eyes closed, he was fully aware when the atmosphere in the room changed.

Then soft hands gently pulled his own away from his head and took their place.

Remus opened his eyes and jumped from his seat.

"I...um....I mean....er....oh _god_."

Remus could only stare at Sirius, his dark hair tousled from sleep, a tentative smile on his curved lips.

"You look like you've seen a ghost Re."

Remus didn't mean to take a step backwards, it was just a reflex action, but he saw the flicker of emotion cross Sirius' face.

"Maybe I have." Remus whispered, facing his life mate, the table between them. He took up the bottle and took another large swig. Then, heart pounding and breaking at the same time, he slowly raised his wand, pointing it directly at the other man.

"Who _are_ you?"

Sirius took a cautious step backwards, his eyes narrowed. Slowly he raised his hands, palms outward, so that Remus could see that he was unarmed.

"What the hell are you doing, Remus?" he began. "It's _me_, it's _Sirius_... Remember?"

"Don't play fucking _games_ with me!" Remus yelled. "Who are you and what are you doing in this house?"

Sirius stared at him, uncomprehending. "Remus? It's me."

"Liar." Remus spat out the word as if it were a curse, keeping his wand arm steadily trained on Sirius. "Sirius is dead. Everyone knows that."

"What? I'm _what_? Since when?"

Suddenly Remus lowered his wand. "I know who you are," he said tiredly. "Nice try, Tonks. Didn't know your talents extended so far. You really had me going for a bit there. You can change back now. I'm done playing."

Sirius simply gaped at him.

Remus sighed wearily, turning his back and pretending to busy himself with the kettle. "Quit it, _Nymphadora_. I'm too old for this shit."

"Don't call me that," said Sirius.

Remus' laugh was bitter and jagged. "Hate that, don't you?"

"It's not my bloody _name_, that's why!" Sirius persisted. "Was it a Memory Charm? One of those sodding Death Eaters threw an _obliviate_ your way, is that what happened?"

Remus snorted. "Yeah. Memory Charm... Whatever you want. All I fucking _have_ now is memories, and you want to sully those too. Great. Thanks." He swiveled around, piercing Sirius with his gaze. "And if you really aren't Tonks, then you've got to be a ghost. So why don't you just piss off and haunt someone else?"

"I give up, Remus." Sirius slumped into a chair, leaning forward until his forehead leaned against the tabletop. The wood was cool against his skin, and the slight prick of its rough texture reassured him that he was indeed wide-awake. His sleep-mussed hair fell forward, obscuring his face.

_I'm not dreaming. I'm not... _

I must be... and since when does Re swear so much? 

"Get your head off the table."

"Make me."

The tone was so much like the Sirius of his memories that Remus faltered. He stepped cautiously over and tapped Sirius on the shoulder.

"Come on, get up."

"Piss off," mumbled Sirius, swatting half-heartedly at Remus' hand. "You don't even believe in me, so leave me alone."

"Alright, that's it!" Remus growled. He reached down and, grabbing a thick hank of Sirius' hair, attempted to pull the other man upright.

Sirius twisted easily out of Remus' grasp, but as he did so, the chair toppled over, both men crashing heavily to the floor.

"_Ow_," laughed Sirius. "Good thing I was here to break your fall."

Remus said nothing. He stared at Sirius as though he'd never seen him before, realization slowly dawning in his eyes.

"Re?" asked Sirius. "Remus? Are you alright? Are you hurt anywhere?"

"Hurt? _No_," Remus breathed, lying sprawled across his friend. _Friend? No, my love, my mate... Oh god, he's real, he's real!_ "You're... you're here? _You're here_! My god, Sirius, it's been so_ long_..."

"Did you hit your head on something?" Sirius asked, laughing.

_And_, Remus thought, _oh god it was the same laugh, the one that always sounded more like Padfoot's bark_...

With a wordless cry, Remus flung himself down against Sirius' chest, burying his face in the other man's shirt. Strong arms enfolded him, holding him securely until his ragged sobs began to quiet.

"Shh," Sirius whispered soothingly, "it's alright. I don't know what's with you, but you're going straight back to bed. You can't... You're still recovering from a transformation, you know."

Remus allowed himself to be led back to bed and tucked in like a child. But as Sirius turned to leave, Remus clutched at his hand. "Stay with me. You're always... always _leaving_ me. First Azkaban... then the veil... Just stay with me, _please_."

Sirius leaned down, placing the lightest of kisses upon Remus' lips. "I'm not going anywhere," he said, climbing into the bed fully clothed. "Not while you need me."

"Mmm," murmured Remus, nestling into Sirius' embrace. "Better than firewhisky."

"Um, yeah..." said Sirius. "When did you start drinking like a fish, anyway?"

Remus closed his eyes, stifling a yawn. "After the veil."

"Re, be serious."

"No, I can't be," Remus said, smiling at the old joke. "_You're_ Sirius."

Sirius sighed. "Remus. I was Stunned. _Stunned_. I don't understand what's in there, but I swear to you I was only behind that veil for a few bloody minutes."

Remus shook his head. "No... Oh, god, you..."

"Shut up," Sirius said. "I'm telling you what happened, okay? Fuck, Re, it was only _yesterday!_ The Stunning spell wore off – it was Bella's so how good could it have been anyway, right? I... it was really dark in there... and so cold, so _unbelievably_ cold..." He didn't notice his unconscious shiver as his voice trailed off. "But I got out after a few minutes. And by then the battle was over... and... you'd all left me... And now you're acting all Confunded and I don't even know if we won or not!"

"Oh god," Remus whispered, horrified. "You _don't_ know..."

"What?" said Sirius, panic tracing his voice as Remus stared incredulously at him. "_What_ don't I know?"

"Two years, Sirius," Remus said, his voice hitching a little. "It wasn't yesterday that you fell through the veil... It's been over two years..."


	3. Revenant Ch3

**Chapter Three**

Remus continued to stare at Sirius, watching as he absorbed the information. He chewed on his lower lip, watching Sirius gaze in disbelief at him, seeing the confusion, and then slow comprehension, flit across his face.

"Why?"

Remus frowned, sitting himself up to lean on the bed head. "If you mean why are you back...I don't know. I'm not sure anyone fully understands the veil and how it works. All I do know is that no-one..._no-one_...has ever come back."

Sirius shook his head. "I _can't_ have been dead. I'd have known...wouldn't I? Shit, I don't know. I swear it was only a few minutes."

"To you, yes. But to the rest of the world... two years have gone by...and now you're back!"

Remus couldn't suppress a wild grin. He had the urge to hug Sirius to him and never let him go, but he couldn't, not yet.

Remus hadn't left the cottage for almost two years, unable to face the outside world, but with Sirius back in his life he felt he could do anything.

He pushed back the covers and climbed out of bed, reaching for his robes.

"Where are you going?" Sirius' voice had an edge of panic in it.

"We're going to go to Dumbledore. He may have answers that I don't."

They arrived at Grimmauld place less than a half hour later, and by the smile that lit Dumbledore's face it seemed they were expected.

"Welcome, dear boys. Come in."

They followed Dumbledore down into the kitchen, where Kingsley and Tonks were both sitting talking softly.

They stopped when the men entered the room.

Sirius faltered at the door, not sure he truly wanted to know what had happened to him, but Remus gripped his hand firmly with his own, gently leading him into the room.

Remus caught sight of Tonks' raised eyebrows, but ignored her, seating himself close to Sirius' side.

Dumbledore sat opposite them, his smile still in place, and his blue eyes twinkling. "Well, young Mr. Black. You've had us rather worried about you, but I see Remus here found you alright."

Remus smiled, one of the first genuine smiles in a long time. "It's no less than a miracle to have Sirius back." He squeezed the hand, still firmly in his under the table.

"But why?" Sirius croaked, turning his gaze fully on Dumbledore.

"I will answer that question in just a few moments, I promise. But I am sure you wish to know what has transpired since you left us."

Sirius' jaw hardened. It was easy to see he wanted answers immediately. He was never one to wait patiently. But with Dumbledore it was always best to let him take his own course to the truth.

Slowly he nodded.

"Excellent. Well, the last thing you must remember is of course the battle at the Ministry. After you were...stunned...I feel the other side lost their momentum. Certainly it was over very quickly after that. It took time after that for many to work through their feelings. Especially Harry and Remus."

"Harry!" Sirius burst out as though it was the first time thought of his godson had crossed his mind. "Is he ok? What happened? Where is he?"

Dumbledore smiled again. "I have great pleasure in telling you that Harry is happy and healthy. He is currently studying to be an Auror, but I believe he will be joining us here for the upcoming Christmas holidays."

"And what a present we'll have for him." Remus murmured from his side.

Sirius was frowning again.

"So...it's all over? We...won?"

"We did," came Kingsley's deep voice.

"But it cost us." Tonks added, bitterness plain in her voice.

Sirius tensed, not sure he wanted to hear anymore.

"Who?"

"You remember Harry's friends? Ron and Hermione?" Remus shifted a little closer to Sirius, wanting to protect him, but knowing it had to be said.

Sirius nodded, dread filling him. Those young, vibrant people?

"Hermione...died. In the last battle. Ron's ok, but he was hit with the Cruciatus curse and has been out of it for a while. Others died, but none I think you would have known."

"But Harry's ok?"

"Yes," Dumbledore assured him. "And now it is time to turn to your first question. The Veil."

"I want to know one thing right now. Was I dead?"

The silence in the kitchen was suffocating. Everyone's eyes were on Sirius, and just one glance at them answered his question more eloquently than any words could have.

Remus watched the warring emotions on Sirius face. He wanted to ease all his fears, all his worries. Tell him everything would be ok, but he didn't know how.

"How did I come back then? And why?"

"I have an excellent theory on that." Dumbledore leaned closer, his eyes gentle. "The same force that saved Harry, that protected him from death...has also protected you. Harry's mother protected him with the strength of her love and, if I'm not mistaken, the strength of young Remus' love for you was enough to protect _you_, even from death."

Remus ignored the shocked gasp that escaped from Tonks, ignored the knowing smile on Dumbledore's lips; all he saw was Sirius turning in his seat to look at him.

That deep grey gaze looked deep into his soul. One hand rose to run through Remus' hair, to slide down his cheek with such tenderness Remus felt tears prick his eyes.

Then Sirius stood, pulling Remus with him. "I need time to think."

"Of course." Dumbledore nodded, that smile still playing on his lips. "Take all the time you need."

"But what about-"Tonks began, but Dumbledore raised a hand.

"Not now, my dear. Not now."

Remus allowed himself to be led up the stairs by Sirius, allowed Sirius to pull him into the room they had once shared, watched as the door was kicked closed and watched Sirius turn towards him.

In less than a heartbeat Sirius had pulled Remus into his arms, kissing him furiously.

It was so rough, so desperate that it felt more like an attack to Remus, but he had no complaints. It had been two years since he had last tasted Sirius' lips, since he had felt those hands slide along his back as they were now.

Sirius' tongue invaded his mouth over and over, his hands pulling Remus shirt off roughly.

In the momentary pause Remus murmured, "I thought you wanted to think."

"No, Remus,' he breathed into his ear, causing a fluttering to start deep in his stomach, 'I want to _feel_. I want to forget everything but us."

Remus moaned softly but the sound was captured by Sirius' mouth.

They took a few stumbling steps backwards before Sirius pushed him to the bed.

This wasn't his usual Sirius, who was so gentle and loving to him. This was a man who was in pain, whose mind was tormented, a man who needed desperately to feel alive and Remus was happy to let him take whatever was needed.

"Pants off," Sirius commanded, hauling off his own clothes and tossing them carelessly aside. "_Now."_

Wordlessly Remus complied, wary of the strange glint in the other man's eyes. This was Sirius as he had been in the midst of battle, a dangerous force to be reckoned with.

Without preamble, Sirius threw himself roughly down upon his mate, crushing his lips to Remus'. He was already half-hard. Fiercely he rubbed his groin against the other man, his rapidly hardening erection pressing almost painfully into Remus' hip.

Sirius began licking and nuzzling his way down Remus' thin body, nipping every now and then with his teeth at a particularly sensitive area. He stopped just short of Remus' cock, surveying the other man for a long moment.

Merlin, he's almost as thin now as I was when I left Azkaban... 

Remus, achingly hard, arched his hips up towards Sirius' lips, trying to stifle the pleading whine rising from his throat.

But then Sirius' mouth was on him, hot and fierce, and Remus cried out with pleasure, lost in the exquisite sensations that Sirius lavished upon him.

"God, Sirius," he breathed. "You don't... don't know... how I've missed this... missed _you..._"

Abruptly Sirius pulled away, Remus' cock slipping from his mouth with a wet smacking sound. He sat up, forcing Remus' legs apart and nudging his own member against Remus' entrance.

"Um," said Remus. "We haven't any... That is, I didn't know we'd be needing any lube..."

"'S okay," grunted Sirius. "We'll make do." He spat on his hand, then rubbed it along his length, trying to make it as slick as possible. But the fierce need for his mate overrode practicality, and Sirius plunged forward, heedless of Remus' shocked gasp of pain.

It took only a few minutes for both men to reach orgasm, Remus' seed spilling hotly over his belly while Sirius pumped furiously within him, collapsing with a fierce cry as he came.

After a moment, he rolled off Remus, turning away and burying his face in the pillow.

Remus propped himself up on one elbow, puzzled. "Sirius?" he asked.

Sirius muttered something incomprehensible into the pillow.

Tentatively Remus reached out a hand, gently stroking the other man's hair. "Sirius?" he asked again. "Are you alright?"

Sirius rolled onto his back, staring blankly at the ceiling. "I hurt you, Re," he said softly. "I always swore I'd _never_ do that... And now I have."

"You didn't hurt me," Remus reassured him. "Well, alright, I'm a bit tender, but it's been two years since we... Sirius, are you _crying_?"

Sirius was. He flung himself at Remus, nearly knocking him off the bed, burying his face in Remus' shoulder as he wept under the sheer weight of the last forty-eight hours. "So sorry, Moony," he gasped brokenly. "I... This... And... I'm so _sorry_!"

"Shut up," said Remus, cradling Sirius in his arms. His arse _was_ damn tender now, and he shifted slightly to ease it. "Stop it, Padfoot. You'll make yourself sick."

And it was alright, really, Remus realized, stroking Sirius' hair and murmuring comforting words at him. _Face it_, he thought, _how would I feel if I'd just been told I'd been dead for two years?_

Patiently he held the other man as Sirius' desperate sobs slowly abated.

Eventually Sirius raised his head. "Moony?" he said.

"Yes?" asked Remus, gently placing a kiss on Sirius' forehead.

"Am I dreaming this?"

Remus shook his head. "No."

"Did I hurt you?"

"No. Well, not much. But I understand. That is... Oh, hell," he said, wincing at the horrified expression on Sirius' stricken face.

Sirius pushed himself upright, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. "What did you think of Dumbledore's explanations?" he asked, retrieving his clothes from across the room and pulling them on.

Remus shrugged. "He may well be right," he said, picking up his own clothes off the floor. "He's almost never wrong about things like that, you know."

"I know. But..." Sirius frowned. "Why did it only seem like a few minutes to me? Are you _sure_ I was... y'know... I mean, maybe I wasn't..."

"You were dead," Remus said flatly. "I'm a werewolf, remember? You're my mate. Trust me, if anyone knew if you were dead or not, I did."

Sirius impulsively pulled Remus into his arms. "Merlin, Re..." he whispered, "it must have been horrible for you."

"Yes," Remus said simply. "It was. But it's nothing – _nothing!_ – compared to what I feel now that you're _back_." He tilted his head up so that their lips met, delicate this time, full of love rather than Sirius' earlier ferocity. "Love you, Sirius," he said softly.

"Love you too, Remus," Sirius replied, kissing him again. "Now come on."

"What? Where?"

Sirius paused, one hand on the doorknob. "I've got two years to catch up on! Let's go _out_! Celebrate my victorious return to the land of the living and all that!"

Remus shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other. "Er... We can't."

Sirius narrowed his eyes slightly. "And why not?" he asked.

"Well," Remus said. "Pettigrew's dead, you know."

Sirius snorted. "No great loss."

"And even though he did eventually confess everything... About James and Lily, about you... "Remus continued hurriedly. "Somehow in all the fuss, your name never got cleared. So."

"So I'm still a wanted criminal?" Sirius was aghast. "After two _years_? What, no one figured it mattered because I was assumed _dead_?"

Remus nodded uncomfortably. "Pretty much exactly how it went, actually. Hermione was making some good headway on it, but then we had the last big battle, and she... Well, she..."

"Who killed her?"

Remus coughed. "Bellatrix."

"That _bitch_!" yelled Sirius, slamming his hand against the wall. "I hope she rots in hell! Don't tell me she still lives, Re."

"No," Remus said grimly. "She doesn't." His eyes had taken on a haunted look, and he exhaled slowly before continuing. "I killed her myself, Sirius. For Hermione, but mostly for you. And I laughed when she died. I _laughed_ at her."

"Shit, Re," said Sirius, remembering how Remus had always hated even the mere idea of harming another, how the thought made him cringe in terror each month as his wolf-change drew near. _But_, he thought, _war brings out strange things in us all_...

"I know what'll make you feel better," said Sirius, grinning. "We'll go visit Harry."

Remus sighed. "You can't just go popping in on people! Returning from the grave isn't something you can just spring on someone!"

"Ah, come on, Moony," Sirius cajoled. "I bet he'll be thrilled. We'll take Buckbeak."

"Er..."

"What?" asked Sirius. "Oh, Hagrid's got him, does he?"

Remus sighed again. "Sirius, you'd better sit down."

Remus could see the colour draining from Sirius' face as he sat hard on the bed.

"Buckbeak _too_?" he whispered, head in his hands.

"I'm sorry...if it helps at all... he died saving me. He used himself as...as a shield. I guess he must have known..."

"How much you mean to me." Sirius finished for him. His expression was soft, loving but it suddenly turned hard and he stood abruptly. "You said back in the kitchen that there were no other deaths I would need to know about...any other nasty surprises up your sleeve?"

Remus stood too, pulling the rumpled sheet with him to cover his nakedness.

"No, Sirius, that's not it...I just..."

"Forgot. How convenient that you can do that." Sirius spat, turning away to gaze out the window.

Remus walked tentatively over to him, reaching a hand for his shoulder. "None of us can make it better for you...I know that. And I'm not fool enough to say the pain will heal with time, because that's the kind of junk they force-fed me for two years...but Padfoot, I will always be here for you."

"I said that to you too, remember? I don't know how long always is anymore." Sirius sighed, but laid his own hand over Remus' reassuringly. "It's going to take some getting used to, but we'll manage somehow."

Remus smiled and watched as Sirius left the room, presumably heading for the shower.

Rummaging around in their old wardrobe, he found a faded pair of jeans and one of Sirius' old black t-shirts. He pulled them on then made his way gingerly down to the kitchen. It was more discomfort now than actual pain.

It seemed that Tonks and Kingsley had left. Only Dumbledore was there now, seated at the table, a sheaf of parchment before him which he was reading.

The light was fading and a few lamps had been lit, casting a soft glow on the old man. The fire had died down to embers, but they still cast off their warmth. Remus felt it caress him as he walked softly past.

Dumbledore looked up, smiling and gesturing for Remus to join him at the table.

"How is your young Mr. Black?"

Remus looked up at the use of the word 'yours'.

"How long have you known?" He asked softly, a slight flush appearing on his cheeks.

Dumbledore reached over to pat his hand gently.

"Much longer than you would probably expect, dear boy." He pulled his hand back and shuffled through the papers. "I always knew that something special would become of your friendship."

"And...it doesn't bother you?"

Dumbledore looked up. "Now why on earth would it bother me, my boy? Two young men that I happen to be quite fond of being in love? If there is one thing I highly approve of...its love."

Remus wanted to ask more, but Dumbledore was so matter of fact it seemed he wouldn't get any further anyway.

"Sirius wants to go out."

Dumbledore nodded. "Of course he does, and he will get the chance soon enough. I'm sure you can keep him occupied in the meantime."

Remus gave a wry smile. "Sirius was never one to be kept cooped up against his will."

"Who said it had to be against his will?" Dumbledore gave a roguish wink before turning once more to his reading, ignoring Remus' surprised stare.

It was rather surreal, discussing such things with his old headmaster, and he was more than a little relieved to feel familiar arms slide onto his shoulders. Sirius gave Dumbledore a challenging look as if daring him to say something, but the headmaster just smiled and continued reading.

Sirius sank into the chair next to Remus, and Remus could smell the mingled scent of soap and Sirius, and still the slight odor of sex.

Remus' lips curved upwards at the thought.

Sirius said, "I know I can't see Harry, but can I write to him?"

Dumbledore opened his mouth to answer but they suddenly heard a door slam above them.

"Anyone here?" a young voice called. "I'm home!"

Footsteps sounded on the stairs, thumping their way down towards the kitchen.

Instinctively Sirius stood.

Harry strode into the kitchen, pulling off his heavy robes. "I was lucky enough to get off early so I thought I'd come back home now..."

Harry must have realized the room was quiet, because he looked up from fighting to get his sleeve off, confusion on his face.

His eyes landed on Remus first. "Professor Lupin!! Great to see you!"

Harry took a step forward and suddenly noticed the man standing by the fire.

"Oh my god..."

"Hello Harry." Sirius said softly.


	4. Revenant Ch4

**Chapter Four**

"Si... Sirius?" Harry gasped, staring in shock at his long-lost godfather. His robes still dangled forgotten from one arm. "Is it really you?"

Sirius grinned. "It is."

Finally yanking his arm free of his robes, Harry flung himself across the room at Sirius, nearly knocking them both over. "Thought you were dead!" he cried. "I thought I'd lost you for good!"

"Yeah," said Sirius, giving his godson a rough hug. "That seems to be the general consensus around here." It was a bit unnerving to realize that Harry had grown several inches over the past two years, and was now tall enough to look Sirius straight in the eye.

Suddenly Harry pushed back, a suspicious look on his face. "When?" he asked abruptly.

"Not long," interrupted Remus. "Just over a day or so."

"I know what you must be thinking, Harry," Dumbledore soothed, "but we were not hiding anything from you. Sherbet lemon?"

Harry opened his mouth to say something caustic, but thought the better of it. Instead he wisely sat down and accepted the proffered candy from Dumbledore's outstretched hand. "Thanks," he said. "Alright then. How?"

"Erm," said Sirius, glancing sideways at Remus, who immediately turned bright red and became very interested in the small cracks in the ceiling.

"Honestly," said Harry, plainly exasperated. "I'm of age now. Whatever it is, you can tell me. And I'm pretty sure I deserve to know."

"The boy's right, Sirius," Remus sighed, finally catching Sirius' eye.

"I know, I know," Sirius grumbled. He took a deep breath. "We reckon that maybe.... Well, the headmaster has a theory that..."

"... that just as Lily's love saved you from Voldemort," supplied Remus, "my love for Sirius was strong enough to protect him from the effects of the veil."

Harry stared. "But that would mean... You mean... You and Remus? You're..."

"We are," Remus stated firmly, threading his arm through Sirius'.

"Butterbeer all around, I think," said Dumbledore, with a mild wave of his wand. "And perhaps some sandwiches," he added, gently retrieving the refreshments from where they hovered a few inches above the table.

Remus gave Sirius a small shove towards the table. "Go on. I'll bet you haven't had a butterbeer in two years," he said, his eyes twinkling.

Harry continued to stare at the two men, noticing suddenly the ease with which they interacted with each other, the frequency with which they touched. _Should I have known? _he wondered_. Does it even matter?_

"Harry," Dumbledore said softly. "One does not choose love. It simply happens. And that, Harry, goes beyond gender."

_It **doesn't** matter_, Harry thought, and grinned broadly. "You're right," he said, "as always. Sirius, Remus, I think I'm very happy for you."

"You _think_ you're happy for us?" asked Sirius.

"Well," Harry admitted, "it's a bit of a shock. First you were a murderer, then you weren't. Then you were dead, and now you aren't. Now you're apparently gay, which is a bit of a shock in conjunction with the not-dead thing..."

"Actually, I'm not gay," said Sirius, biting heartily into a sandwich. "I don't think so, anyway."

"You're not?" Remus asked, a bit stunned. "You've been doing a fairly good imitation of it!"

Sirius threw a bread crust at Remus. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing," Remus said airily, easily ducking the crust.

"But," said Harry, looking utterly confused. "You just said..."

"I meant," said Sirius, "that I love this man because he's Remus... Not I love Remus because he's a man. Get it?"

"I think so..."

They ate contentedly for several minutes, pausing only to say things like "pass the butterbeer" or "another sandwich?" or (in Sirius' case) "I hate egg salad!"

When the food had been eaten and the plates pushed aside, Dumbledore rose gracefully from his chair and cleared his throat.

"I did not want to bring this matter up quite yet," he began, "but I can hardly think of a more opportune time, and it is a matter of rather extreme importance."

Remus, Sirius, and Harry exchanged furtive, puzzled glances.

"As you know," the headmaster continued, "Voldemort has been defeated."

Sirius snorted. "_I_ didn't know," he muttered under his breath.

Dumbledore inclined his head. "Very true, Sirius," he said. "My sincere apologies."

"'S okay," Sirius mumbled, embarrassed to have mentioned it at all.

"However, I do not believe we are in the clear just yet," Dumbledore continued gravely. "Since Sirius vanished through the veil over two years ago, there have been several disturbing incidents at the Ministry of Magic."

A sharp tap at the window startled the four men. Remus quickly strode over to admit the owl who hooted balefully, sticking out its leg so that Remus could detach the parchment. The owl's feathers were ruched up in a dozen directions from the wind outside, and it tried vainly to smooth them.

Remus opened the small scroll, scanning it quickly.

"Harrry," he said, his face ashen. "It's from St. Mungo's. About Ron."

Though it pained both of them to do so, Remus and Sirius stayed at Grimmauld place while Dumbledore and Harry went to St. Mungo's. Neither of them had known Ron terribly well, but they knew how much he meant to Harry, and that was very important to them.

Full night had fallen outside, and to keep his hands busy Remus stoked up the fire in the kitchen. Leaving the lamps on low, he sat himself down on the worn sofa in the corner, hoping that Harry would get good news.

Within a few minutes Sirius was in the room.

"I was wondering where you disappeared to," he said softly, sitting down next to Remus, one hand sitting gently on his leg.

Remus sighed. "Harry has been through so much already. Seen so much pain and suffering..."

Sirius squeezed Remus' leg reassuringly, putting an arm around his shoulder to pull him closer.

Remus smiled and rested his head on Sirius' shoulder.

It was such a serene moment, so like the old days, that Remus wanted to hold onto it forever.

The fire crackled and Sirius caressed his leg softly. Neither spoke. After the turmoil of the last few days this was so peaceful that Remus felt like closing his eyes and sleeping, right there in Sirius' arms.

"I'm sorry, Moony," Sirius whispered into his hair.

"For what?"

"For earlier...for hurting you. For taking out my frustrations on you. It wasn't fair of me to do that to you."

Remus shifted so he could look at Sirius. His grey eyes were so dark with fatigue right now they looked as black as his hair.

Remus lifted a hand, running his fingers through the dark strands. "Nothing matters to me except having you back in my life. I was empty without you..."

Sirius made a sound deep in his throat and leaned down to kiss Remus.

There was none of the earlier ferocity. This was pure and gentle. Sirius traced Remus' mouth with his tongue, daring to delve inside several times, causing Remus to moan softly.

Shifting, he pulled Remus under him, hands stroking Remus' sides tantalizingly.

Remus moved his hands down Sirius' back, tucking them deftly under the band of his jeans to cup his backside. Sirius ground himself against Remus, a predatory growl escaping him.

Someone cleared their throat.

Startled, Sirius tried to sit up so quickly he ended up rolling off the sofa, pulling Remus with him.

As they untangled themselves, they peered over to the door, and both faces became extremely red.

Dumbledore and Harry had returned, along with what looked like the whole Weasley family.

Sirius stood first, offering his hand to Remus and pulling him up beside him.

"Um...," Molly said, blushing, "perhaps I should make some tea?"

"That sounds lovely, Molly." Dumbledore said, chuckling softly.

Arthur was just standing at the door, almost as red as Sirius and Remus. Fred and George were there too, grinning in an amused way, and Ginny was smiling behind her hand.

"Er...we didn't hear you come in," mumbled Sirius.

Remus nudged him in the ribs for stating the obvious.

Finally Arthur spoke.

"It's marvelous to see you back, Sirius!" he smiled and stepped forward to shake Sirius' hand jovially.

"Thank you, Arthur."

Fred and George shook his hand too, and Ginny gave him a small hug. Sirius blushed at all the attention.

Remus broke the uneasy silence by asking the inevitable. "How is Ron?"

Immediately Molly began to wail. Remus frowned, concerned, but Arthur grinned at him. "He's finally come out of it. We managed to have a very small conversation with him!"

"It's so...so...wonderful!" Molly cried, sobbing over the teapot.

Ginny went over to comfort her and the others took seats at the table.

"He's really beginning to get a sense of self again. Knew where he was, who we were!" Arthur continued.

"That's wonderful to hear," Remus smiled. "Does anyone know what he remembers? If anything?"

Dumbledore sat with his tea, while Molly and Ginny handed around other cups. "I believe everything will come to him in time. I'm afraid he is still coming to terms with...losses."

"Hermione," Remus murmured, sympathizing with Ron about the loss of the one you loved. He reached out a hand for Sirius, who caught it and brought it to his lips, kissing it gently.

Harry cleared his throat.

"Sirius might not know that they got engaged right before the last fight..."

Sirius suddenly understood what Remus was thinking at that moment.

"Yes, time...and things will get easier," Remus said softly, not thirsty any more, simply tired.

Dumbledore took a look at both of them. "I think its time to call it a night. We can talk more tomorrow."

Remus smiled gratefully as they both said their goodnights and made their way up the stairs to their room.

Remus undressed then slipped under the covers. In a few moments Sirius joined him, reaching out his arms to pull him close.

"Love you Remus."

Remus smiled, snuggling close.

"Love you Sirius."

He began to drift into the first peaceful sleep in years, Sirius stroking his hair.

Sirius lay there in the dark, thinking over the events of the evening.

"Re'..."

"Mmm?"

"If Ron and Hermione were engaged, would it be possible he knew about what she was working on? I mean, to clear my name?"

Remus shifted slightly. "It's actually quite possible. I never thought of that...but we may not be able to find out anything like that for a while."

"I know," Sirius murmured. "Go to sleep Re'"

"G'night Sirius."

It took very little time for Remus' breathing to become deep and even.

_He must still be exhausted from his transformation_, Sirius realized. He lay on his side, propped up on one hand, quite content to watch Remus sleep.

For a while, at least.

Gradually his shoulder began to stiffen, and Sirius eased himself off the bed, careful not to wake Remus. Quickly he dressed. There was no way he could sleep, not now, not with so many things preying on his mind.

_Can't have everything_, he thought, glancing ruefully over his shoulder at his lover as he tugged on his boots. Truthfully, there was nothing Sirius would have liked better than to snuggle back into the bed, letting Remus kiss away all his fears and questions. But Remus needed sleep far more than Sirius needed answers, at least right now.

Noiselessly he stole from the room and down the stairs, unconsciously avoiding the creaky parts of the steps.

The empty front hall was silent as a tomb.

Sirius paused, debating for a long moment. His mind still reeled with the sheer wealth of information he'd had to assimilate.

His freedom, still compromised. Hermione. dead. Buckbeak, ever loyal, also dead. Ron, hospitalized.

The war, apparently over, yet Dumbledore hinting that more was yet to come. _But_, thought Sirius, _how could there **be** more, if Voldemort is dead?_

And then, of course, there was Sirius' own return through the veil. _What was it?_ he wondered. Was it truly death that lay beyond it, or something more? Remus claimed Sirius had been dead, and surely he would have known, would have felt their bonding sever...

Sirius shivered inwardly, his muscles knotting under the memory of fierce, relentless cold.

_Like the Dementors_, he thought bleakly, _but worse_. He blinked, startled by the idea that there could somehow be something worse than Dementors.

Voices drifted up from the kitchen. Someone – no, _two_ someones – were coming his way.

Sirius Disapparated.

"I do wish they'd give us more answers, Arthur," Molly Weasley said irritably, rinsing her mug out at the sink. "I want to know when he's coming home."

"I know, dear," soothed her husband. He idly rubbed the small of her back with strong fingers. "So do I. He's getting the best of care, though; we can't fault them for that."

Molly made a distinct noise that clearly stated that the best care at St Mungo's was nothing compared to what a mother could do.

"Cheer up, Mum," added Fred. "It could have been a lot worse."

George, his twin, elbowed him sharply in the ribs. The twins, now twenty, had a clear idea of what "worse" meant: Percy. Although they had done phenomenally well with their joke shop – Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes – their success had never been able to overshadow the other tragedies that had befallen the Weasley family in the recent years.

The four were silent for a moment, each remembering proud, ambitious Percy, who'd refused to the end that Voldemort had returned. He'd publicly ostracized his family throughout the war, preferring to turn a blind eye as the conflict raged on.

His name was no longer mentioned in the Weasley household, and no one knew what had become of him. Molly mourned her lost son silently, as only a mother can, and occasionally wondered how Peter Pettigrew's mother must feel.

"D'you think he's remembered about Hermione yet?" asked George, desperate to veer the subject away from the unspoken Percy.

"I don't think so," Molly said. "He wasn't quite himself yet."

Fred frowned. "I thought you said he knew who he was..."

"...and where he was," finished George.

Arthur smiled fondly at his sons. The twins had been finishing each other's sentences since they'd first learned to talk. "Well," he admitted, "he did... to an extent. He seemed to think, actually, that _he_ was visiting _us_."

Molly sniffled.

"Well," Fred said hastily, "best get to bed."

"Yes," agreed George. Neither wanted to be the cause – indirect or otherwise – of another outburst of tears. "We're very, ah..."

"Tired!" supplied Fred. "Long day and... um... everything."

"All right, dears," sniffed Molly, kissing them both on the cheek as they stooped over her chair to hug her goodnight. "Check in on Ginny, will you? She's had such trouble sleeping lately."

"Will do, Mum," they chorused.

As soon as they were out of earshot, George asked, "What d'you reckon? Think Ron'll pull out?"

"He'll be fine," whispered Fred, pitching his voice low. "He's stronger than he looks, that one... But don't ever tell him I said so!"

_Crack!_

The twins stared at each other, bewildered, then around the empty hall as they emerged into it.

"Who Disapparated?" wondered Fred aloud.

There were few places a wanted man could wander in relative obscurity, and Knockturn Alley was one of them. Still, Sirius took no chances, turning his collar up and his eyes down. He hunched over as he walked, making very sure to catch no one's eye.

It was surprisingly easy. The wind was bitter, smelling of snow, making Sirius shiver as he threaded his way along the twisted, narrow street. It seemed very few people were eager to be out in such weather, even if the closely set buildings did block most of the wind.

Across the street from Borgin and Burkes, a shop rather well known for its "ask-no-questions" attitude, stood a small bar that Sirius had never heard of before: The Severed Head.

_That's just disgusting_, Sirius thought, surveying the crude sign, _but I'll bet I could get a drink in there. Shit, do I even have any money?_

A quick search through his pockets revealed a handful of Galleons, along with a smattering of Sickles and Knuts.

_Fair enough. Couple of drinks, then_.

He hauled open the heavy wooden door, stepping gratefully out of the yawing wind.

The place itself was not very large, not half the size of the Leaky Cauldron, but it was blissfully quiet. A few patrons huddled at the narrow bar, surreptitiously shooting suspicious glances towards him. Three or four scarred tables lay in the shadowed corners, one of them on its side.

The bartender glared at Sirius, slowly wiping the wooden counter with a filthy rag. "Firewhisky," he barked suddenly. "'S all we got. Take it or leave it."

"I'll take it," growled Sirius, and dropped some coins on the bar.

The bartender slopped the alcohol into a rather battered looking glass, which Sirius hurriedly took to the furthest table. Seating himself with his back to the wall, he surveyed the room.

There really wasn't much else to see. Three people sat hunched over their drinks at the bar, and that was it. One looked, like Hagrid, to be half-giant, but not nearly as friendly. As Sirius watched, the man lurched to his feet and began heading for the door. Halfway there, he toppled over and lay muttering incomprehensibly at the ceiling. No one seemed to notice.

_Doubt they'll notice me so much then_, Sirius thought with a suppressed snicker. It was very good to be out... even if it was here.

Sirius sipped his firewhisky, wrinkling his nose a bit. It tasted a bit off, but he decided it was due to the not-so-clean glass or that it was perhaps watered down.

_Probably a bit of both_, he thought, downing it anyway. _Better get back before I'm missed_.

He wiped his mouth on the back of one hand, and stood up to go.

The door opened suddenly, admitting a howl of wind and two well-bundled figures. Sirius' eyes widened in shocked recognition as they unwound their scarves and wraps.

_That's the Malfoy brat_, he realized, ducking back into the shadows. _I'd know a Malfoy anywhere. But... what's he doing here? And more important... what's he doing here with Snivellus?_


	5. Revenant Ch5

**Chapter Five**

Sirius stayed as far back in the shadows as possible as the two figures made their way to a table and sat.

They were just close enough for Sirius to make out what they were saying.

"So why _did_ you call me here in the dead of night?" Snape muttered, his eyes darting around the pub nervously.

"I've heard whispers that something unusual happened at the Ministry a few nights ago. I thought maybe you'd have some idea what it was."

"And why would you think that?" Snape's eyes narrowed, studying the boy before him carefully.

Draco gave a scowl. "Because of the company you keep."

Snape gave a small smile, which looked like more of a grimace from Sirius' vantage point. "And you thought I might divulge such information to _you_?"

Sirius heard a rattling sound as Draco pulled a small bag from under his robes.

"I'd make it worth your while."

"So like your father..." Snape said softly.

Draco narrowed his eyes. "I'm more than my father ever was. He was fool enough to get himself caught."

Snape regarded him for several minutes.

"The only thing I know at the moment is that filthy werewolf is back from wherever it was he had crawled to."

"No idea why?"

"How am I to know how that animal's mind works? If I'd had my way, I would have had him put out of his misery long ago. Pining away all because of the loss of that..."

Sirius was using all his control to stay where he was. His hand had curled into a fist and he longed to connect it with Snape's jaw for the way he talked about Remus, but this conversation was too important. He gritted his teeth, staying still and silent.

"Never mind that," Draco interrupted him. "Can you find out?"

Snape scrutinized the boy carefully, steepling his fingers below his chin.

"Leave it with me. I will see what I can do."

Draco smiled broadly. "Excellent. Can I buy you a drink before you go?"

"I think not." Snape's eyes wandered to the bar with distaste, then stood. "I will be in contact with you shortly."

"You know where to find me."

Snape stood and made his way out of the pub, unaware of Sirius glaring after him.

After all these years, after Dumbledore's trust...what was Snape up to?

Sirius made his own way out to the dark street beyond and Disapparated.

Remus stretched out in the dark room, reaching to pull Sirius closer only to find cold, empty sheets.

He sat up suddenly, throwing off the sheets.

"_Sirius_?" He called frantically.

"Shhhh." Sirius was silhouetted against the window, but he turned at Remus' voice and walked over to him, pulling the sheets back up gently.

Remus gave a small smile. "For a second I thought..."

Sirius sat beside him, sliding an arm around his shoulders and pulling him closer. "It's alright. I'm right here."

Remus gave a contented sigh, snuggling close, savoring the warmth.

"Can't sleep?" he murmured.

"I'll be fine. Just got a lot on my mind."

Remus lifted a hand to entwine his fingers with Sirius'.

Sirius brought them up to his lips, kissing them gently.

"Anything I can help with?" Remus couldn't help the husky tone in his voice. It just felt so good having Sirius back in his life that he wanted to enjoy every moment.

"I think I just need some sleep," Sirius answered, finally shrugging off his clothing and slipping under the sheets.

Remus didn't mean to feel rejected, but he did just the same. He began to roll away, when Sirius pulled him back.

"We have plenty of time to be together," he breathed into Remus' ear.

"Do we?" Remus answered, but was instantly ashamed.

Sirius smiled into his hair. "Same old Remus. Always worrying."

He yawned widely then and Remus gave him a gentle push onto the bed. "Go to sleep. That's far more important right now."

Sirius pulled him into the circle of his arms, and they drifted off into sleep.

The breakfast table was quite full the next morning, what with the Weasleys still their guests and Harry home for Christmas.

No mention was made of Sirius' and Remus' relationship, but they both still tried not to be overly affectionate in front of the others.

Still, Remus smiled when he felt Sirius' hand on his leg under the table.

Just as they were finishing up, and Molly was busying herself with the dishes, there were footsteps on the stairs.

Sirius looked up to see Dumbledore enter, followed by Snape.

The look of contempt Snape threw at Remus made Sirius want to hit Snape all over again.

Then Snape turned and saw Sirius.

The colour drained completely from Snape's face.

The twins slowly put down their remaining bits of toast.

The conversation Harry had been having with Ginny in the corner completely died away.

Nobody dared move.

"What," Snape finally hissed from between tightly clenched teeth, "is he doing here?"

Dumbledore, who had by this time seated himself at the table and unfolded that morning's Daily Prophet, looked up from his paper. "Ah, yes," he said, deliberately ignoring the growing tension. "Sirius has returned to us at long last."

Sirius leaned back in his chair, arching an eyebrow at Snape. "Good morning, Professor Snape," he said, his voice falsely sweet.

Remus groaned inwardly and covered his face with his hands.

"What's the matter, Black?" Snape sneered. "Did the Veil spit you back out? Did even the afterlife become sick of your sarcasm?"

"Why you – _ow_!" Sirius yelped as Remus kicked his shin under the table, hard.

Dumbledore glanced between the men. "I realize you've had your differences in the past," he began, frowning. "Perhaps it might do to recall that we are all on the same side here."

"That so?" muttered Sirius, glowering.

Remus stood up so fast that he overturned his chair. Hauling it upright, he grabbed Sirius by his shirt collar and forced him to his feet.

"Hey!" Sirius said indignantly.

"Would you excuse us, please?" Remus said to the room at large, gritting his teeth and half-dragging Sirius out of the kitchen.

"Um, of course..." said Molly. "Tea, Severus?"

Snape just scowled.

The twins took one look at the rather murderous expression on their ex-professor's face and hurriedly excused themselves. Ginny shot her mother a pleading look and, at Molly's impatient wave, chased after them.

"You must forgive Sirius," Dumbledore said to Snape. "He has, after all, been through a rather harrowing experience, and is not yet himself."

"Really?" grumbled Snape. "He didn't seem all that different to me."

"Severus, Severus, Severus," Dumbledore chided gently. "You are both grown men. It is long past the time to put aside childish differences."

Snape sighed. "I know, Albus. But I would swear he goes out of his way just to rankle me."

"So do you," said Harry quietly from the couch, startling the other three who had quite forgotten he was there. He would never have dared to speak so to Snape even six months ago, when he'd still been a student, but now that he was out of school, he couldn't resist.

_Besides_, Harry thought, _what's he going to do? Give me detention? Take fifty points from Gryffindor?_

"_Potter_," Snape growled. "Here already? I thought you weren't expected till tomorrow." Snape's venomous expression clearly stated that he wouldn't have come if he knew Harry was here.

"We got off a bit early for holidays."

"Did you now," sneered Snape. "How lucky for us all."

Harry stood up. "I have a few things to do," he said, pointedly ignoring Snape. "Mrs Weasley, let me know when Ron can have more visitors, please."

"Of course, dear," Molly said, but Harry had already left the room.

"What _is_ it with you?" Remus hissed, glaring at Sirius as he forced him up the stairs to their room.

Sirius tried very hard to look innocent. It didn't work; Remus had known him far too long for that.

"What d'you mean?" Sirius asked in an injured tone. "It's Snape, it's _Snivellus_! Gods, Re, if I knew he'd be here, I'd have stayed dead!"

Remus stopped in his tracks. "Don't say that," he whispered. "Don't _ever_ say that. Don't even _think_ it, Sirius!"

"Oh. Oh, Moony." Sirius kicked the bedroom door shut with one foot as he pulled Remus into his arms. "Shit. I'm sorry. I didn't think... I just... reacted..."

Remus leaned his head against Sirius' chest. "Every minute since your return, I've wondered when I'll wake up, wonder when you'll leave me again. Having you back... Sirius, it's too good to be real."

Sirius tipped Remus' chin up to look at him, smoky grey eyes boring into amber ones. "It's real, Remus," he breathed, holding Remus' hand over his chest so he could feel Sirius' heartbeat. "_I'm_ real. This is _all_ real..."

He bent his mouth to Remus', savouring the taste and feel of the other man's lips beneath his own. He deepened the kiss, gradually flicking his tongue against Remus', aroused by his lover's soft moans.

"This is real too, Re," Sirius whispered, breaking the kiss just long enough to pull his shirt over his head. He pulled Remus firmly against him, slowly rubbing his hips in small circles against the other man. Both men were already unbearably hard. "And this is real," he said huskily, dropping to his knees. Swiftly he unbuttoned Remus' pants and slid them off.

"Yes... Oh, Sirius..." Remus gasped as Sirius took him wholly into his mouth, agile tongue working along Remus' erect length. With enormous effort, he pushed Sirius away.

Sirius stared up at him. "Um... Remus?"

"Stop. I mean, I don't _want_ you to stop... Um..." Remus uttered a slightly shaky laugh and ran his hands through his hair.

"Ah," Sirius chuckled. "Lucky I nabbed this from the kitchen then." He held up a small bottle of olive oil.

Remus laughed outright. "_So _glad you remembered! But," he said, still laughing, "I believe I'd rather, ah, give than receive right now."

Sirius flushed. "Sorry 'bout that," he muttered.

"It's okay, really," said Remus as they fell together to the bed.

In the upstairs hallway, Fred Weasley dropped what appeared to be a long piece of flesh-coloured string to the floor. "That's the first time I've ever been sorry we invented Extendable Ears," he said, his face nearly as bright a red as his hair.

"I agree," said George. "Wholeheartedly. But at least we know they still work."

Harry looked shocked. "I think these things work _too_ well," he muttered. "I just didn't need to hear all that... that..."

"'S alright, mate," Fred said heavily. "Maybe we should have stopped listening about twenty minutes ago."

"At least that long," said George, as Harry nodded his agreement.

Ginny said, "I didn't even know a person could do it... um... that way. You know, um, in there."

The three young men gaped at her.

"What?" she said. "It's not like this was covered at school."

"Well, how was I supposed to know what they were up to?" asked Harry, exasperated. "I thought they'd be discussing _Snape_!"

"Sorry, mate," said Fred. "I really, _really_ wish they had."

"Likewise," said George.

"I think they make a very sweet couple," Ginny said, after an uncomfortable moment.

"Too much information!" George moaned, theatrically burying his face in his hands while his twin laughed and clapped him on the back.

"Come on then," said Fred cheerfully. "Who's up for some last-minute Christmas shopping?

Remus and Sirius lay contentedly in each other's arms, all their worries and fears forgotten, at least for the moment.

Remus absently stroked Sirius' arm that lay across his stomach Memories of those two years without him seeming so distant and pale right now, like a long ago nightmare from which he had woken.

He frowned as those memories tried to fight their way back inside his mind, images of sleepless nights, weeping until he ached all over, drowning his memories with firewhisky.

He wasn't sure why, but he had a sudden urge for some again.

No matter how wonderful it was to have Sirius back, he knew it still wasn't the same...yet.

They needed to work through so many things first. Sirius needed answers before he could finally let go of the past and begin to live in the present.

Sirius was sleeping, though Remus was quite sure it was only really a light nap, since it was only shortly after lunch.

Remus shifted slowly towards the edge of the bed, grabbing his jeans as he went. He pulled them on, grabbed a shirt, not bothering to button it up, and crept out of the room.

The house seemed quiet after the breakfast rush. He made his way down to the kitchen, rummaging in the cupboard until he finally found a bottle of firewhisky.

He sat at the table, popping the top and taking a gulp.

It definitely had the wanted effect of calming his nerves.

Relaxing in his chair he leaned back and smiled, taking another small sip.

"It's true, then, what they say about werewolves," came a cold drawling voice from the doorway.

Remus turned to see Snape leaning against the doorframe, a malevolent gleam in his eyes.

Remus knew better than to play into Snape's hands. He knew no matter what Dumbledore said, Snape would never be able to forget the past.

Personally Remus didn't blame him, and he still felt a trickle of guilt for never stopping James and Sirius in their teasing and taunting.

"Hello again, Severus," he said cordially, turning his gaze to the bottle in his hand.

Snape took a step inside the room, pausing at a creak upstairs. But then he turned his attention back to Remus.

"You're all alike, you know that."

Remus ignored him, reading the label of his drink with mock concentration.

"Dumbledore still thinks you're controllable. I suppose that fool Black thinks he can put collar and leash on you and you're harmless...but you're nothing but an animal."

Remus had heard it all before. His entire life had been filled with people who were so scared of him that they never bothered to delve deeper, to discover the man.

He looked up, giving Snape his sweetest smile.

"I sincerely appreciate your Wolfsbane potions Severus. Helps to keep my inner animal at bay."

"You're just as bad as Potter, both senior and junior. Just as arrogant."

"Oh, I have no delusions of being better than anyone else, Severus. I leave _that_ to others."

Remus hadn't meant to give such a snide remark, but Snape was ruining what had promised to be a lovely day.

Snape glared at him. "If you knew what was coming..."

Remus raised his eyebrows. "Is there anything you'd like to share? There should be no secrets among friends after all." He forced his smile back on his face, standing and taking another fortifying sip of the whisky.

Remus moved closer to Snape, stopping when Snape took a step backwards.

"What's the matter, Severus?" he couldn't resist drawling. "I won't bite."

When Snape didn't answer he made to go past him to leave the room when Snape blocked his path.

"Heed my words, werewolf. My plans don't concern you, and if you get in my way..." he leaned a little closer, "it will only take one bullet to remove you from my path."

Snape turned to leave the kitchen but was faced with Sirius, glaring at him, his face masked with a fury Remus could barely remember.

"Going somewhere, Snivellus?" Sirius growled, quivering with barely suppressed rage.

Remus shook his head frantically at his mate. "Don't, Sirius," he said. "He isn't worth it."

"And you _are_?" Snape laughed, keeping his eyes locked with Sirius'. "Why don't you listen to your _pet_, Black?" he said coolly. At Remus' sharp intake of breath, he flicked his gaze towards the werewolf. "In fact, why don't you both..."

_Wham._

"Sirius, _no_!" Remus yelled just as Sirius' fist and Snape's jaw connected solidly with a sickening crack. A heartbeat later, Sirius drove his other fist straight into Snape's chest, knocking the man hard against the wall, his head snapping back against the doorframe.

He pulled back for a third punch, but Remus leapt at Sirius with a hoarse yell.

"_Sirius! What the bloody fuck do you think you're doing_?" Remus screamed at him.

Sirius gaped at him. "You were right here! You heard him! I'm s'posed to stand here while he insults you like that, am I?"

Remus grabbed Sirius by the hair, twisting his head around until Sirius was forced to look at Snape, crumpled and unconscious on the floor. A thin trickle of blood ran out of the corner of his mouth.

"Look," Remus seethed. "I can take care of myself, Sirius. I've been doing it all my life. A few petty insults are _not_ going to kill me."

"He _threatened_ you, Re!"

"Sirius, we are on the same side! _All_ of us!"

Sirius narrowed his eyes, the smoky grey darkening even as he spoke. "Don't be so bloody sure," he muttered, wrenching out of Remus' grasp. He shot one last scathing glance at Snape before storming up the stairs, nearly barreling into Molly who was on her way down.

"That's all right," she muttered peevishly to herself. "No, don't worry. Didn't knock me down..." Spying Remus, she added, "Remus, is it just me or is Sirius completely mannerless? He just – _oh_!" Her eyes widened abruptly, her mouth forming an O of surprise as she took in the scene before her. Snape still sprawled in the kitchen doorway, Remus crouched over him with his wand out.

"Molly!" he exclaimed, jumping to his feet. "Excellent. Just the person I needed. Look, you raised Fred and George; you must know loads of healing spells!"

"Well, yes, but..."

"Um, could you... I mean, I have to go after Sirius before he does something stupid." He slid through the door, edging past Molly who seemed unable to move. "Or something more stupid, that is." He gestured at Snape. "Could you, Molly? Please? For me?"

Molly gave a small, almost imperceptible nod of assent, and Remus vaulted up the stairs two at a time, calling his thanks to her over his shoulder.

"Oh, dear," Molly said.


	6. Revenant Ch6

**Chapter Six**

Remus hurried up the stairs, mentally cursing Sirius Black with every step.

_Chivalrous,_ he fumed. _I'll bet he thinks he's being bloody chivalrous. Protecting the weak or some such rot. Just a bloody pain in the arse, that's what he is!_

He reached the bedroom door and made to open it, but the handle refused to budge.

"Sirius!" he yelled through the door. "Let me in!"

A muffled voice said, "No! Go 'way!"

"Open this door now!"

"No!"

_Protecting the weak? I'll show him weak_! Remus gritted his teeth and, threw his weight against the door. It shuddered in its frame.

Bracing for the impact, Remus rammed his shoulder into the door once more –

-- but it was already open.

He pushed himself off the floor, grimacing and rubbing his shoulder, as Sirius scowled down at him.

"You could have just waited," Sirius grumbled at him.

Remus hauled himself completely upright and quietly closed the door. "Explain yourself," he said, without turning around.

"He insulted you! He..."

"Not that part."

Sirius looked genuinely bewildered. "Re?" he asked.

Remus turned, pushing past Sirius to sit on the edge of the bed. His shoulder ached terribly. "What have you got against Severus? Besides the usual," he added hastily as Sirius opened his mouth to speak.

"Alright." Sirius crossed to the window, fiddling absently with the edge of the curtains. "Last night. I couldn't sleep, right? So, I went out."

"What? Are you _mad_?" Remus' face was ashen. "Do you listen to me at _all_? You're still a wanted criminal! You could have been seen! Arrested, even!"

"Went to this godawful hole-in-the-wall I'd never even heard of," Sirius continued, as if Remus hadn't spoken a word.

"Where?" Remus asked. "Nearby?"

"Knockturn Alley, actually," Sirius said, grinning. "Some place called the Severed Head."

Remus' jaw dropped. "Sirius. You _didn't_."

Sirius laughed at Remus' expression. "Don't tell me _you_ know it."

"I do, as it happens," Remus said in a very strange voice. "It caters to ... Dark creatures... like me... and Dark wizards..."

"Explains a lot," Sirius scowled. "I saw Snape there, and... Hang on, what would you have been doing in there?"

Remus flushed. "It wasn't easy, you know... Getting over you. I never did, really. Wait – did you say _Snape _was there?"

"Yeah, him and that Malfoy kid – whatsisname, Duncan or Drano or..."

"Draco."

"That's the one!" Sirius leaned closer, voice dropping to a whisper. "He was trying to bribe Snivellus for some kind of information... And Snape as good as agreed to give it to him!"

"Did they see you?" Remus asked sharply.

Sirius thought for a moment. "No. No, I'm sure they didn't."

Remus regarded his friend carefully. Outspoken, yes. Rash and impetuous? Definitely. But known for telling lies, Sirius was not.

_Maybe Dumbledore is right. Maybe we aren't out of the Dark Times yet_...

"Well, that's something." Remus sighed, trying to shrug the ache out of his shoulder.

"Sorry about that." Sirius mumbled. "I seem to be doing that to you a lot lately, huh?"

"Doing what?"

Sirius moved closer. "Hurting you." Sirius replaced Remus' hand with his own, kneading his shoulder gently.

Remus moaned softly, but wasn't going to let his body rule his mind. He was still angry at the way Sirius behaved.

He tried to shrug away Sirius' administrations, but Sirius only held tighter. He now had one hand on each shoulder, gently easing the aches away. He leant forward until his breath tickled Remus' ear.

"I'm sorry for acting without thinking, Re._ Really_. But I couldn't let him talk to you like that without doing something. I love you too much."

Remus' jaw twitched with the effort of keeping a smile away, but he remained impassive. Sirius had to learn to control his temper. And running off like that! Remus shuddered to think what might have happened to Sirius if he'd been seen.

"Please Re..."

Sirius ran his tongue along Remus' ear, tracing the shape, and then nipping tenderly. He was rewarded with a soft moan.

"Sirius, it's going to take more than a kiss from you to make this better."

"How much more?" Sirius answered huskily, his hands leaving the slender shoulders to run down to the flat of his stomach.

"Sirius!"

Remus turned to scold him but Sirius captured the words with his mouth.

Remus gave up his fight.

With agile grace Sirius turned enough to push Remus down onto the bed, straddling his legs. He sat up, looking down at his mate with pride.

"So gorgeous," he murmured, easing the shirt off Remus' body.

Remus thought fleetingly that he should really try to put up a bit more of a fight, but as Sirius' hands began to stroke his chest, teasing his nipples, the thought was forgotten.

Sirius ran his hands up his arms, capturing his wrists in one deft movement, leaning forward to kiss him again.

Remus responded eagerly, his tongue meeting thrust for thrust, his hips rising to rub against Sirius greedily.

As Sirius lifted his mouth from his, Remus whispered, "God man, you are insatiable."

"Did you want me to stop?" Sirius answered from somewhere near his neck.

Remus mumbled an incoherent answer and Sirius chuckled. The sound was more uplifting than anything Remus had heard in recent times.

"You should do that more often" Remus said as Sirius moved down to flick his nipple with his tongue.

"What, this?" He flicked the nipple again.

Remus made a rumbling noise deep in his throat.

He'd correct Sirius later.

With a grin, Sirius continued on his path down to Remus stomach, dipping his tongue into the indentation. His hands relinquished their hold on Remus hands and they slowly traveled down his arms.

Remus tried with all his might to fight it, but couldn't suppress a giggle as Sirius' hands ran across his armpit.

"Ticklish are we?" Sirius' eyes lit up at this new discovery, and a wicked gleam lit his eyes.

"Sirius...Sirius, _no_!!" But it was a futile attempt.

Sirius attacked him on all fronts, and Remus squirmed helplessly beneath him.

Within a few moments the gleam had changed in Sirius' eyes, and Remus shivered with anticipation.

Sirius dove at him, covering his mouth with his own, delving his tongue deep into his mouth. Remus felt frantic hands tugging at his jeans, cursing slightly when they wouldn't give straight away. Remus lifted up to aid him and they were deftly slipped down his hips. He kicked them off.

Sirius seized Remus' hard member, stroking it firmly, fingers tracing the tip with tiny circling motions. Remus moaned into his mouth, raising himself to be closer, his hands fumbling with the zipper on Sirius' jeans, intent on an exploration of their own.

A knock sounded at the door.

Sirius swore profusely.

"Bloody hell," muttered Remus into Sirius' shoulder. Raising his voice, he called out, "Who is it?" He tried valiantly to keep his voice steady as Sirius resumed his explorations. "_Quit that_!" he hissed at Sirius, slapping the man's hand away from his groin. Sirius just smirked.

"It's me," a voice said, muffled by the heavy door. "It's Harry."

The lovers exchanged one quick glance before frantically retrieving Remus' clothes from the floor.

"Erm... Just... Um, just a moment," Sirius said loudly. "Just, erm... Got our hands full... Won't be a second!"

Harry's voice, slightly uncertain, came again. "I could come back later if this is, y'know, a bad time..."

"_No_!" Remus yelled, attempting to button his jeans and smooth his hair at the same time. "We were just... ah... talking!" He gave Sirius a cursory glance to make sure he, too, was relatively decent and then opened the door as casually as he could.

Harry entered a bit apprehensively, his sharp eyes unable to miss either the mussed bedclothes or the fact that Remus's shirt was uncharacteristically untucked. "Really," he said, flushing slightly, "it's not that important."

"Nonsense," Remus said briskly. "We were just... discussing... um..."

"Snape," offered Sirius.

"Yes! Actually," Remus said thoughtfully, "we were. Tell me, Harry – has Severus been acting unusual lately?"

Sirius snorted.

"Sirius, be good," Remus said absently.

Harry shrugged. "I haven't been here much, not with Auror training. He's down in the kitchen right now, though. Seems very upset."

Sirius snorted again.

"Stop that," Remus said to Sirius. "You still shouldn't have, and god only knows what Dumbledore will have to say about it."

"About what?" Harry asked curiously.

"Nothing," Remus said hastily, just as Sirius said, "I pounded Snivellus," a note of pride unmistakable in his voice.

Harry's mouth fell open. "You did? _Really_?"

Remus sighed, absently rubbing his sore shoulder. "Harry... Was there something...?"

"Oh!" Harry broke out in a grin. "I nearly forgot! Erm, seeing as tomorrow is Christmas Eve and everything, we were wondering... Maybe you two would like to help us decorate the tree?"

"Tree? Christmas? _What_?" Sirius looked completely baffled.

"Who's we?" asked Remus.

"Oh, you know," said Harry. "Me. Ginny. Fred and George. Everyone, really. Mrs Weasley's been trying to get Bill and Charlie to come too, but neither's owled her back yet."

"It's _Christmas_?"

Remus laughed. "Yes, Sirius. I guess you wouldn't have known, would you?"

"That's right," Harry grinned. "And Remus, no one's seen you the last two Christmases either, or Sirius – obviously. So you _have_ to be there!"

"We'd love to," Sirius said. "When?"

"Tonight, I think," Harry said, turning to leave. "I'm going to grab a sandwich or something. You... You get back to... um... whatever it was you were doing..."

"Each other?" Sirius said devilishly. He suddenly prodded Remus in his ticklish ribs, making the other man squirm as he tried to hold back a shout of laughter.

"I don't need the exact details!" Harry exclaimed, pulling the door nearly shut behind him. Suddenly he poked his head back in. "Sirius," he said, "I don't know if you remember... But if either Fred or George offer you a sweet... _don't take it_!"

"Why not?" Sirius asked Remus as Harry closed the door.

"Let's just say that those two could easily give the Marauders a run for the money," Remus said.

Sirius pondered this a moment.

"Oh, no," Remus said. "Get that thought out of your head right now! No pranking them, Sirius, I mean it!"

"Take all the fun out of it, why don't you," Sirius said, scowling. But a moment later, he grinned. "Re? What do _you_ want for Christmas?"

Remus stepped forward, pulling off his shirt again. He wrapped both arms snuggly around Sirius, tilting his face up for a kiss. "I think I already got my present," he said softly. "You came back to me."

"That I did," Sirius said, "and I always will." Pulling the other man back onto the bed, he deftly unbuttoned Remus' jeans, sliding them off his hips in one smooth motion. He stroked his hands lightly along Remus' backside, as the other man writhed helplessly against him.

"More of that, please," Remus murmured, already more than half hard. With his own hands he reached under Sirius' shirt, teasing his lover's nipples delicately with the tips of his fingernails.

Sirius groaned, arching his hips against Remus. "Want to taste you, Re," he muttered thickly, inching his way down Remus' body, tracing the outline of old scars with his tongue as he went.

Another knock sounded at the door.

Sirius groaned and pounded his head against a pillow.

"_What?_" Remus yelled. "Is it really important?"

The door edged open, and Harry peeked around the corner of it, immediately blushing a deep crimson as he took in the scene.

Remus suddenly realized he was starkers and dove for the blanket.

"Can you guys come downstairs?" Harry said quickly, his eyes clenched tightly shut. "Dumbledore just arrived – I think Snape must have firecalled him... Sirius, he wants to speak with you."

Sirius bit his lip. "Does this have anything to do with Snivellus?"

"Afraid so," Harry said, nodding. "Snape's _livid_. And... Well... I hate to tell you this, but Dumbledore didn't seem too happy with it either."

"I told you, Sirius," Remus broke in. "This is what happens when you and Severus start brawling like first-years. Harry, you can open your eyes; I'm dressed."

"Oh, thank god," Harry said. "Wait – I didn't mean it like that – I just – I'll be going now!" He ducked out the door, thoroughly flustered.

"Come on," Remus said heavily, heading towards the door. "We may as well get this over with."

Sirius said nothing, but reluctantly followed Remus downstairs, suddenly very, very nervous.

It was a somber scene they walked into as they entered the kitchen downstairs a few minutes later.

They had hurriedly dressed and tidied themselves, making themselves as presentable as they could in such a short space of time. Still, they couldn't hide the flushed cheeks or eyes darkened with passion.

If anyone noticed, they didn't say anything.

Dumbledore was sitting at the table, his face serious, Snape seated beside him. Harry had been right. Snape looked livid. _More_ than livid if there was such a thing. A nasty bruise was appearing on his jaw, but it was nothing like the nasty gleam in his eyes.

"Please sit down," Dumbledore asked softly and Remus and Sirius did so immediately, opposite him and Snape. "It has come to my attention that there is some tension between some of you."

Remus heard Sirius give a muffled snort and nudged him under the table.

"However, as we are all adults here I am sure you can work out any differences on your own. What I _am_ here for is far more urgent. We have only just found out that there is a new band of Death Eaters and they are most interested in finding out about the... _incident_... at the Ministry."

"Do they know about Sirius?" Remus asked, worry etched over his face.

"I don't believe so, but if they did find out it could spell a lot of trouble."

Sirius shrugged. "Why? I mean, why would them knowing about me make any difference? They have no interest in me."

"They don't care about _you_," Snape spat contemptuously. "They care about the Veil."

"But why?" Remus started but was interrupted by Dumbledore.

"Who knows what plans will unfold if they ever discover that someone can come back."

This statement was met by silence.

Remus glanced at Sirius, trying to mentally convey to him how important it was for him to stay hidden. But Sirius appeared to have already gotten the hint, and he didn't look as though he liked it, not one bit.

Harry had been sitting on the sofa in the corner, remaining silent so far, but he stood and came to stand next to Dumbledore, the worry clear in his eyes.

"D'you...do you think they might try to bring Voldemort back?"

Dumbledore gave him a smile. "Let us not worry about things for now. As I stated, we do not believe they have found out about Sirius, but I must urge you," and at this he turned to face Sirius, "to stay here and keep out of sight. And this is not just for your protection any more. It is vital to _all_ of us."

Sirius gave a cursory nod. Remus laid a reassuring hand on his shoulder and Sirius laid his over the top of it gratefully.

Remus didn't miss the furrowed brow on Snape's face as he watched them. He sighed. Another person who was yet to find out about them. Another reason for Snape to hate him and taunt him.

They climbed the stairs a few hours later. They had a detailed conversation with the rest of the Order about the problems and implications of the new developments. Sirius was grumbling about his new imprisonment, for every single member had reiterated to him that he must stay at Grimmauld Place.

"What the hell am I supposed to _do_ stuck in here day in, day out?" he moaned, kicking their bedroom door open.

Remus smiled, lighting a lamp as evening settled outside. "I can think of a few ways to amuse you."

Sirius grinned, pulling off his clothes and sliding into the bed. "We can't do that every second of every day, no matter how much I'd like to." He gave a roguish wink, holding his hand out to Remus, silently asking him to join him.

Remus took the proffered hand and allowed himself to be pulled into the circle of Sirius' arms.

Sirius immediately began nuzzling Remus' neck and Remus smiled. "Incorrigible aren't you," he murmured, enjoying the wicked sensations Sirius was conjuring up.

"What do you expect?" Sirius breathed into his ear. "We keep being interrupted."

"Not this time, I'm sure." Remus stated, pulling Sirius into a deep kiss.

Sirius' hands continued their earlier exploration. "You're wearing too much," he growled.

Remus quickly shrugged off his shirt and jeans, slipping under the covers and reveling in the feel of skin on skin.

Sirius lost no time in ducking under the covers and taking Remus into his mouth. A growl rose in Remus' mouth and his fingers tangled into the silky black hair, urging him on.

Sirius flicked and licked until Remus began to shudder beneath him. With gasping breaths Remus came, every inch of his body tingling with the sensation.

With a devilish smile, Sirius emerged from under the covers, one hand still stroking and caressing his lover.

Remus leaned in to kiss Sirius, tasting himself on those talented lips. "I think it's my turn," he whispered softly, gently turning Sirius so his back nestled into Remus' chest.

Sirius wriggled closer to him and Remus felt himself respond once more.

"And you said _I'm_ incorrigible?" Sirius teased.

Remus silenced him with a swift kiss, his hands creeping around to stroke Sirius, who was hard with need.

Retrieving the oil which sat on their bedside table, Remus trickled some onto himself before snuggling close to Sirius. He rubbed himself against the entrance before easing himself inside, savouring the groan that escaped his mate.

Remus moved inside of him, still keeping up his smooth stroking on Sirius' hard member.

It took only a few minutes for both men to reach their peak, shuddering against each other, pulling each other as close as they possibly could.

"So that's what it's like," Sirius murmured sleepily.

"What _what's_ like?" Remus asked, brow furrowed in confusion.

"Doing it with you _without_ being interrupted."

Remus laughed, kissing Sirius soundly. "Go to sleep, Padfoot."

"G'night Moony."


	7. Revenant Ch7

**Chapter Seven**

"Moony."

No response. Sirius poked Remus in the arm.

"Moony, wake up."

"Mmph," Remus mumbled into the pillow. He opened one bleary eye. "Sirius, it is the middle of the night. What is so bloody urgent that it couldn't wait until a decent hour?"

Sirius ran a hand over Remus' tousled hair. "You're really cute when you're asleep, did you know that?"

Remus groaned, stifling the urge to hit Sirius with something heavy. "You woke me up for _that_?"

"No," Sirius said. He leaned over and kissed the nape of Remus' neck. "I was wonderingâ Does Snape ever sleep here?"

Remus rolled over and glared at Sirius. "Don't do that. _Ever_," he said. "Don't kiss me and talk about Severus in the same breath."

"Sorry," Sirius said, wincing. "Good point."

"Anyway," Remus said, "he's always made it a point not to spend a night in this house. He only comes for Order business, or to bring Wolfsbane. Why d'you want to know?"

Sirius shrugged. "Just wondering." He swung his legs out of bed and felt around on the floor for his trousers. He decided not to bother with a shirt, especially as he couldn't find one in the dark.

"Going somewhere, are you?" Remus asked sharply. "You're _not_ sneaking out, Sirius! There's too much at stake now!"

"Relax. I'm just popping down to the kitchen." Sirius leaned over, giving Remus a quick kiss. "Go back to sleep."

The kitchen was empty, and just cool enough that Sirius wished he'd looked a bit harder for a shirt.

Shivering slightly, he opened the pantry, reaching for the firewhisky he knew was there.

"Pour me one too, will you?"

Sirius nearly jumped right out of his skin. He whirled around, but it was only Tonks. She stifled a small yawn with one hand as she sat down at the table.

The glasses were still in the same cupboard as they'd been his entire life. Wordlessly he poured firewhisky into two of them, and brought them to the table.

"Brr," Tonks said, shivering. "Cold in here. Want me to poke the fire up a bit?"

Sirius shrugged, indifferent.

Tonks pulled out her wand and pointed it at the dully glowing embers in the fireplace, muttering a quick spell. The fire blazed to life once more.

"Bloody hell," said Sirius, staring at the flames.

"Sorry 'bout that," Tonks said sheepishly. "A bit of overkill, thereâ I expect we'll be baking in a minute."

"Mmph," said Sirius, downing his glass and pouring himself a second.

Tonks sipped at her firewhisky, eyeing Sirius over the rim of her glass for several minutes. "You're awfully quiet tonight," she said finally. "Where's Remus?"

"Sleeping."

"Ah. And couldn't you?"

"No."

Exasperated, Tonks slammed her glass down on the table, nearly knocking over the firewhisky bottle. "Damn it, Sirius," she said, quickly righting the bottle before it spilled. "We used to be able to talk to each other!"

Sirius said nothing and refilled his glass.

"Alright," Tonks grumbled. "I'll go. I just thought you might like some company, that's all." She left her half-full glass on the table and turned to leave.

"What's everyone not telling me?" Sirius burst out. "What's all this about more Death Eaters?" He looked up at her pleadingly. "C'mon, Tonks, you're family. Talk to me."

She slowly sat back down in the chair opposite him. "Sirius, I don't know any more than you do."

"Codswallop." He drained his glass. "I hate being cooped up in here, Tonks."

"I know," she said softly.

He poured a fourth glass. "It's like being back in Aksâ Azbâ Absâ Oh, you know," he frowned, "that prison place."

Tonks snorted. "Maybe you've had enough of that," she said, trying unsuccessfully not to laugh at him, as she picked up the firewhisky and put it away in the pantry. When she turned back around, her control broke and she burst out laughing; Sirius was face down on the table.

"'M not drunk," he slurred. "Really."

"Yeah?" said Tonks, one eyebrow raised. "Stand up then. Go on, I dare you."

"Don' hafta," Sirius said loftily, looking back up at her. "I like it here." His hair fell into his eyes and he tried to sweep it back with a rather grandiose motion, causing his chair to tilt precariously backwards.

"Sirius, I really don't think"

_Crash!_

"â that you should lean back like that," Tonks finished lamely as Sirius tried to untangle his limbs from each other. She immediately went over to help him, although Sirius didn't appear to quite notice that he had toppled over. She heaved him awkwardly to his feet, cursing him under her breath.

"You're bloody heavy, d'you know that?" she complained, struggling not to drop him. Sirius was leaning on her heavily, and Tonks contemplated leaving him on the couch in the corner. There was no way she could get him upstairs.

"Snape's up to something," Sirius said suddenly.

Tonks paused, biting her lip. "I know," she whispered. "We'll talk more, I promise. Now, can you walk? I can't carry you."

It was close to lunchtime before Remus dared to wake Sirius up.

"Rise and shine!" he called cheerfully, pulling back the heavy drapes to reveal a dazzling ray of sunshine.

Sirius groaned, burying himself deeper under the covers.

Remus chuckled, perching himself on the edge of the bed and tugging the covers off the other man.

A growl issued from Sirius, sounding so much like Padfoot that Remus had to blink to make sure he hadn't transformed in front of his eyes.

"You have no-one to blame but yourself." Remus lectured, leaning to pick a pair of jeans from the floor for Sirius to put on.

With lightening speed an arm snaked around his waist, pulling him backwards.

Sirius nuzzled his neck, a tongue lazily caressing him. "Come back to bed," Sirius whispered huskily, his mouth making its way stealthily to his ear.

"Mmm, as tempting as that sounds we have more important things to do." Remus wriggled out of his grip, thrusting the jeans at Sirius' chest.

"More important?" Sirius pulled a mock hurt face and Remus laughed.

"Just get dressed and come downstairs." Remus blew him a kiss then left him to get ready.

As he made his way downstairs he mused how he had ever survived without his mate. Certainly, leaving him there in that bed, his hair mussed up, his eyes still drowsy, was one of the hardest things he had ever had to do.

_God, why does he have to look so damn sexy, even with a hangover?_

That wasn't exactly true, Remus mused, smiling at the others as he sat in the drawing room. Sexy, oh yes, but Sirius had never really suffered from hangovers.

_Not like me_.

Remus remembered only too well what he was like after having too much to drink.

It wasn't long before Sirius entered the room, barefoot and bleary eyed, but alert.

"So, what's up?" he asked the room in general.

Harry smiled. "You forgot already? It's time to decorate the tree!"

They spent an enjoyable afternoon trimming the tree. The Weasley's were in good spirits, having just received word that Ron was still improving. They planned on visiting him for Christmas. Molly invited Remus to accompany them, but he declined, not wanting to leave Sirius alone in the house.

"Don't be stupid," Sirius said briskly. In matter of fact, he thought a few hours on his own might be nice. Ever since his return he had been with people constantly and, apart from Remus, he felt rather uncomfortable around them all.

"Go," he urged. "I'll be fine."

"I'll think about it." Remus answered noncommittally.

Dumbledore joined them again for dinner that evening, but Snape was thankfully away.

The next day would be Christmas Eve, and Remus was racking his brain trying to figure out what to get for Sirius. He would have to go to Diagon Alley in the morning.

His face must have shown he was deep in thought because Sirius leaned close and whispered, "Is everything ok?"

"Mmhm." Remus smiled, enjoying the moment.

The fire was lit in the drawing room and they all sat around it. Dumbledore took the armchair closest to the fire and Remus was concerned by how tired he seemed, but Dumbledore was smiling contentedly, his gaze traveling from person to person, lingering a little longer on Harry.

Chatter eventually turned back to their conversation the previous night.

It was obvious Harry was more than a little worried, and as he voiced his fears Remus studied him, struck again by how young he was, when he had the aura of someone much much older.

"Do we even know how the veil works?" Sirius piped up from his spot next to Remus.

Every eye turned to Dumbledore, who sighed. "I'm afraid the veil remains as much a mystery as ever. We have our theories of course, and it has been studied at length for some time. That it is linked somehow to death is fact. That all who die can be reached through itâwe do not know. In fact I highly doubt it."

Remus knew why Harry and Sirius looked so downcast at that. If it could be used to reach anyone who had died then it may have been a way to contact James and Lilyâ Remus would have given anything to give them what they wanted.

"For now though, it is a time of celebration! Of loved ones returned, of friends and family. I will of course be nearby until the beginning of term, when I must return to Hogwarts."

The younger ones went to bed not long afterwards, but the others stayed up for a nightcap, though Remus poured very little into Sirius' cup.

Sirius frowned at his quarter full cup, his gaze flicking to Remus' almost full one.

Remus leant to whisper in his ear "I want you to be fully coherent." He said wickedly, his tongue flicking Sirius' ear, heedless of the small audience.

"What's the matter?" Sirius asked as Molly goggled at them. "Never seen one bloke lick another one's ear before?"

"No," she answered truthfully, "unless you count the other night upstairs." Arthur choked on his tea trying not to laugh, and even Dumbledore's eyes were twinkling.

Sirius downed his drink in a single gulp, frowning into the bottom of his cup as though he was expecting more firewhisky to magically appear. When it didn't, he set the cup back down on a nearby table ruefully.

"Come on," he urged Remus, who sat slowly sipping. "Drink up. I want toâ umâ go look at the tree again."

Remus simply winked at him over the rim of his cup and didn't budge.

"Bloody hell," Sirius grumbled. He deftly slipped the cup from Remus' hand, quickly downing the contents.

"Sirius!"

"Look at that; you're done," Sirius said cheerfully. He turned, nodding his head towards the others. "Goodnight, all."

The tree _was_ beautiful.

It stood in one corner of the living room, sparkling with myriad lights reflecting off the multitude of ornaments and tinsel. In the otherwise darkened room, it shone like starlight. Remus dropped to his knees in front of it, staring up at the tree in childlike wonder.

Sirius sat down a few feet away, but he ignored the tree, having eyes only for his mate. In the dancing, twinkling light, the years fell easily away from Remus' face, all the sadness and pain he'd endured for so long falling forgotten to the wayside. The grey in his hair became less noticeable, and it was easy for Sirius to see him still as the youth with whom he'd fallen so deeply in love.

_Why didn't I say something before Azkaban?_ he wondered. _All that wasted timeâ I hate time; it's nothing but a dirty thief. Look at all it stole from us_

Remus turned to look at him then, a tiny smile curving the corners of his lips.

"Come sit with me," he whispered. His (_so-beautiful_, thought Sirius) amber eyes gleamed with naked lust.

Sirius knelt on the floor next to Remus, leaning in until their lips met. He gave a slight gasp as Remus' tongue slipped into his mouth, twining with his own. They stayed like that for long moments, tasting, devouring.

Eventually they broke apart, but only just. Remus' cheeks were flushed, his lips slightly parted. Sirius uttered a small groan at the sight of his lover looking so damned delectable.

"Upstairs," Remus said hoarsely.

"Yes," said Sirius.

There really was no need for words, which Sirius privately thought was a _very_ good thing as he didn't feel up to making coherent ones at the moment, not while Remus was actually (_oh gods!_) undoing Sirius' shirt buttons with only his teeth and tongue.

His hands, of course, were busy much lower.

Remus' hot breath against his chest was indescribable, and Sirius moaned when his mate paused to thoroughly lick first one nipple, then the other, teasing them to hard little peaks. Remus' breath misting across them wrought delicious shivers throughout his body.

"Moan as loud as you like," Remus whispered, moving up to nuzzle Sirius' throat, his erection pressing against Sirius' own. "That door's not only locked, but warded and silenced as well." Gently he pushed Sirius backwards, down on to the bed, quickly divesting himself of his own clothes. "God, Sirius" he breathed, "you were meant to be naked for me"

Kneeling on the floor between Sirius' legs, Remus took him slowly into his mouth, lapping at his cock with long, slow strokes as Sirius writhed beneath him.

"Uhâ Moony" he moaned, helpless under Remus' ministrations. "Where'd you learn" His voice trailed off into a sigh as Remus slid Sirius' length out of his mouth almost entirely, lapping just at the head with tiny darting movements of his tongue. The sensation was dizzying, exquisitely maddening.

"Remus, _please_," Sirius pleaded. "Let me touch you." He didn't know how much more of Remus' teasing tongue he could take.

"Busy," mumbled Remus, as he moved his attention lazily along Sirius' shaft all the way down to his balls. He reached blindly for the small bottle of oil Sirius had brought upstairs earlier, opening it one-handed and slicking some of it over his fingers. Gently he prodded at Sirius' arse, slowly inserting one finger, then a second, grinning as Sirius' soft moans turned to louder – _much_ louder – growls of pleasure. He bucked against Remus, unable to stop a whimper when the fingers were suddenly withdrawn.

"Aren't you the wanton puppy tonight," Remus murmured, positioning his cock against Sirius' tight entrance and slowly pushing in. He wrapped one warm hand around Sirius' engorged cock, fisting it in time with his measured thrusts.

"God, Padfoot," he crooned, "â so good, so _good_" His thrusts quickened, his breath ragged. Sirius cried out something wordless beneath him, digging his fingernails into Remus' back as his seed spilled out of him across both their bellies.

Remus gave a final thrust, coming hard inside Sirius, before collapsing breathlessly atop him.

Sirius suddenly laughed. "Yeah, Moony," he said. "_That's_ what I wanted for Christmas. How _ever_ did you guess?"

"What to get for the dog who's got everything," Remus snickered into Sirius' shoulder. After a moment he rolled off him, but remained curled around Sirius, one arm flung protectively across his mate.

"Are you staying here tonight?" Remus asked drowsily, "or are you planning to wander the house again?"

Sirius frowned. "I just have so many unanswered questions, Re"

"I know," Remus said, kissing Sirius' ear. "But they can wait till morning, can't they?"

Sirius rolled onto his side so that the two men were lying face to face. "Yeah," he agreed, snuggling closer and letting his eyelids droop shut.

"You know I don't care to meet you here," Snape hissed, sitting warily down at the gloomy back tables in the Severed Head.

Draco lazily smiled and said, "Did you have a better place in mind?"

Snape simply glared at him. "Let's just make this quick."

"Alright," Draco said. He leaned closer, withdrawing a small but heavy drawstring bag from the folds of his cloak. The coins in it jingled softly as he casually dropped it on the table between them. "Tell me what you know."


	8. Revenant Ch8

**Chapter Eight**

Snape eyed the coin bag, and then slowly turned his gaze back on the young man sitting before him. "You said you've taken precautions that my name will not be linked to this information."

"Of course." Draco smiled, a glint in his eye.

Snape deliberated for a few more seconds before taking a breath.

"Black is back."

"Black? _Sirius_ Black? You mean that man who escaped Azkaban? The one that was killed?"

"The same."

There was an excited gleam in Dracos eye now, and a small smile curved one side of his lips. "He was dead... and now he's back." It was a statement, not a question. "You've seen him?"

Snape gave a curt nod which broadened Draco's smile to a grin.

"_Very_ well earned," he said, pushing the bag towards Snape.

Snape stood, but did not take the coins.

"Take it. You earned it."

"I think not."

Draco scowled but took the money back, hiding it within the folds of his robes. "Very well. One last thing before you go."

Snape turned back, curious.

"Do you have any idea _how_ he got back?"

"No, but it seems to have something to do with that werewolf."

Draco frowned, deep in thought, and he waved Snape away.

Snape exited the pub in a flurry of snow.

Remus woke early the next morning, stretching languorously. Once more, Sirius was not there.

Fighting back the first wave of panic, Remus replaced it quickly with annoyance. Where on earth... no, _why_ on earth did Sirius have to get up before him every morning? Just once Remus would love a lazy morning snuggled up next to that delectable body

Before Remus' thoughts began to go off on a tangent all their own, he swung his legs off the bed, pulled on a robe and made his way downstairs.

He was descending the steps to the kitchen when he saw a dark figure crouching at the slightly open door as if listening to something. As he stepped closer he saw it was Sirius, who put a finger to his lips, gesturing inside.

Brow furrowed, Remus crept close, leaning forward just far enough to peek through the crack. Snape was in the kitchen, his head stuck in the fire. He was obviously having a conversation with someone.

In another minute or two, Snape began to straighten up.

Immediately Sirius entered the kitchen, suspicion clearly written on his features.

"Morning, Snivellus. To what do we owe the pleasure of you being here so early?"

Snape was obviously surprised, but schooled his features so they were unreadable. "I can assure you the pleasure is all yours." He sneered, making his way to the door.

"Who were you talking to?" Sirius demanded.

"That is none of your concern, Black."

"In case you hadn't forgotten, this is _my_ house, Snivellus." Remus placed a warning hand on Sirius' shoulder but Sirius shrugged it away. "What you do in my house _is_ my business."

"What I do is _none_ of your business," Snape spat contemptuously.

"I'm keeping my eye on you, Snape."

"Watch away."

Snape turned and left the room.

Remus turned to face Sirius, anger welling up inside of him. "Are you thick or something?"

"What?" Sirius asked innocently.

"When will you let up on Snape? He's on our side! Do you want to get in trouble?"

"_Our side?_ The only side Snape works for is his own. I wouldn't be so sure of him if I were you."

Remus' patience broke. "For fuck's sake, Sirius! Leave it alone! Who cares what he's doing? Just so long as it doesn't affect us."

Sirius blinked. "Re, how could you defend him? After all he's said?"

"Words, Sirius. Nothing but words. Just drop it. Don't try to dig up trouble just because your life seems so boring right now."

Sirius' jaw clenched. "I'm not dropping it, Moony. He's up to something-"

Remus slammed a fist on the table. "Enough! I don't want to hear it. In fact" He gazed at his lover, hurt and rage and pain coursing through him, but fear for Sirius' safety more important than anything. "I don't want to see you until you've given up this crusade of yours."

Sirius spluttered and stammered, his dark eyes pleading, until finally they glazed over with resolution.

"You'll see, Re. You'll see."

And he swept out of the kitchen. Remus heard his steps retreating up the stairs and he sank wearily into a chair.

As much as he wanted to believe Sirius, he just couldn't believe Dumbledore had been wrong about Snape. As much as he disliked Snape, Dumbledore trusted him, trusted that he was on their side, and that should be enoughâ€ shouldn't it?

Remus ran a hand despairingly through his hair, and fought back tears. Fighting with Sirius was not his idea of a merry Christmas.

_There isn't anywhere I can go_, Sirius silently fumed as he clomped up the stairs. _Can't go out to a pub, can't go for a walk... Hell, I can't even go out and buy Remus a sodding Christmas present!_ Muttering curse words under his breath, he locked himself in the bedroom, leaning back against the door and surveying the room with undisguised distaste.

_What the bloody hell am I supposed to do in this mausoleum all day? How am I supposed to prove that Snivellus is plotting against us if I'm shut up in here? How am I supposed to clear my name?_

"Sirius?"

Sirius grudgingly opened the door at the tentative knock. "'Lo, Tonks," he grumbled. "Remus sent you, did he? Has to make sure I'm being a good boy?"

Tonks shook her head. "No, I haven't even seen him. Um" She glanced around the bedroom. "Can I come in?"

He stood back marginally to allow her enough room to squeeze by. "What can I do for you, Tonks?" he sighed.

"More what _I _can do for _you_," she replied, grinning.

Sirius raised one eyebrow. "I beg your pardon?"

"No, not like that," she added hastily. "But I'm off to do a bit of last-minute shopping. D'you want me to pick up anything for Remus for you?"

"_Would_ you?" he said, immediately brightening. Yanking open the night-table drawer, he felt around for the small sack of Galleons he'd always kept there. "Here," he said, dropping the entire sack into Tonks' small hands. "I don't know how much you'll need, but make sure you pick up some good chocolate, if nothing else."

"Will do." Tonks winked as she experimentally hefted the bag of coins. "That's an awful lot of chocolate, Sirius."

"He _likes_ chocolate," Sirius said.

"I know," Tonks said, rolling her eyes. "We _all_ know." They both laughed.

As she turned to go, Sirius grabbed her elbow. "Take care of yourself," he whispered urgently. "Watch your back. I don't know who these new Death Eaters are, but odds are _they_ know _us_."

Tonks nodded solemnly. "Master of disguise, I am, remember?"

"Fair enough," he chuckled. "I sound like Moody, eh? _Constant vigilance_!"

As he closed the door behind her, Sirius' good spirits quickly deflated. What did it matter if he got Remus a Christmas present or not, if Remus wouldn't see him? Briefly he considered actually doing what Remus had asked, but he couldn't leave the business with Snape alone. _I'm like a dog with a bone_, he thought wryly_. Fitting_.

However, he couldn't shake the fact that he'd seen Snape in a questionable place with, of all people, a Malfoy. _Like father, like son_, he thought grimly. He'd overheard their conversation. He'd –

He'd go to Dumbledore, that's what. _Why didn't I think of this sooner_?

He fairly bounded down to the kitchen, intent on using the fire there to speak with the Headmaster, but pulled up short when he saw Harry and his friends clustered around the table. They didn't see him right away, immersed in their gift-wrapping as they were, but glanced up when he self-consciously cleared his throat.

"Sorry," Sirius said. "I – erm – thought everyone was out."

Harry hastily threw a tea-towel over the small box he was wrapping. "Sirius!" he exclaimed. "You're here!"

Sirius took a step closer, trying vainly to peek around Harry to see what he was hiding. "Sure. I live here."

"Quit it!" warned Harry, keeping himself between Sirius and the table. "It's for you, okay? I'm not so quick at wrapping."

Sirius' eyes lit up. "For me? Harry, you didn't have to... Can I see?"

"No, you can wait till tomorrow like everyone else," Harry said.

Sirius threw himself down on the couch in the corner, long legs hanging over the armrest. He whistled tunelessly for a few moments, trying very hard not to keep glancing over at the table.

"Ginny, go distract him!" Harry whispered. "I can't do this with him watching!"

"Sure. I'm done with mine, anyway," she said. Ginny picked up her Butterbeer bottle and sauntered over towards the couch. Halfway there, she stopped, holding up her bottle. "Did you want one of these, Sirius?" she asked.

"No, thanks," he said, offering her a genuine smile. She sat down next to him and tried unsuccessfully to think of something to say – _anything!_ – that didn't involve him, Remus, and what she'd overheard the other day on the Extendable Ears.

"All done!" Fred sang out cheerfully from the table as he and George Vanished the leftover bits of ribbon and paper. "Give us a hand, Ginny?"

"Of course," she said, grateful that she wasn't going to have to distract Sirius any longer. It was bad enough that she was bursting with questions that would have made her mother faint, but it was certainly a relief to know she wasn't going to accidentally _ask_ one of them now. She and the twins gathered up the gaily wrapped packages and left the kitchen, leaving Harry alone with his godfather.

"Did you and Remus have a fight?" Harry asked, after a slight awkward silence. "Only he was in a bit of a temper when he went out."

"Sure," Sirius muttered. "_He_ can go out, but _I_ can't."

Harry looked uncomfortably at his feet. "He doesn't want to risk you, Sirius. No one does. _I _don't."

Something in Harry's tone caught Sirius' attention. "I'm sorry," he said humbly, and meant it. "I was going to firecall Dumbledore. Would you, though? I mean, in case he's with anyone who shouldn't see me?"

"Sure," Harry said, a bit unnerved by this new, docile Sirius.

"Ask if he's got a minute to stop in," Sirius added.

Kneeling on the hearth, Harry took a pinch of Floo powder, and tossed it on the flames. He'd barely had his head in the fire a few moments when he pulled back, grinning. "Says he'll be right here."

"Thanks, Harry."

Harry frowned at Sirius. "Is something wrong?" he finally asked.

Sirius sighed. "Harry... D'you trust Snape?"

Harry thought for a moment. "I'll never _like_ him," he said honestly, "but I've fought side by side with him against Voldemort. Dumbledore trusts him, and I've learned to accept that."

There was a sudden bright flash as Dumbledore stepped out of the fireplace, brushing soot off his robes. Bright red and festooned with intricate gold and silver embroidery, the robes made him the very image of Father Christmas.

"Sirius!" the Headmaster said cheerfully. "What can I do for you?"

"Uh" Sirius shook his head to clear it slightly. "Erm... nice robes."

"Yeah," echoed Harry faintly.

"Thank you. They _are_ rather festive, aren't they? But," he said, eyes twinkling, "I daresay that isn't what's on your mind."

"No," Sirius admitted bluntly. "I'm concerned about Snivel – I mean, about Snape." Briefly he recounted the conversation he'd overheard in the Severed Head. "And if Malfoy – Lucius, I mean – was a Death Eater, odds are his son is one, too."

"A fact that is well known to us," Dumbledore agreed solemnly.

"And then this morning... Snape was firecalling someone, and he flat out refused to tell me who. I thought... Well, I thought he was in contact with... with _them_," Sirius finished lamely.

Dumbledore smiled. "He was, in fact, speaking with me, and I do assure you I am not a Death Eater."

"I can't... I'll never trust him. Not with a Dark Mark still engraved on his arm."

"Severus has always been an excellent spy for us, Sirius," Dumbledore continued. "I trust you will keep this to yourself, of course. And you too, Harry."

Sirius glanced guiltily over at his godson. He'd quite forgotten Harry was even there. "I did tell Remus," he admitted.

"Another completely trustworthy individual," said the Headmaster.

There was a sudden _crack!_ as Tonks Apparated. Her hair, currently shoulder-length and violently pink, was disheveled, and a fresh bruise was developing along the line of her jaw. Her eyes, round as saucers, were utterly terrified.

"D-death Eaters!" she stammered, as Sirius, Dumbledore and Harry all leapt to their feet.

"Are you all right?" Sirius barked.

"Y-yes," she said, still shaking. "But I s-saw... They're onto us. They... they've taken Remus!"

Remus turned his collar up against the bitter cold, thrusting his hands deeper into his pockets as he made his way along the Muggle street.

Admittedly, it was nice of Tonks to accompany him, but with the mood he was in he preferred to be alone. Tonks tried for the first ten minutes to keep up a steady flow of conversation but when it became obvious she was the only one talking, she soon fell silent.

They parted company when they reached the stores, Tonks popping into a sweet shop and Remus continuing until he came to a jewelers.

After a discussion with the owner he finally found what he was after and amid smiles it was packaged neatly into a small box.

_If only he knew_

Smiling contentedly, some of his bad mood easing, he strolled along the snow-covered footpath towards the café where he'd arranged to meet Tonks.

Halfway there, he sensed he was being followed. He quickened his pace, seeing Tonks in the distance. From the look on her face the pursuers weren't exactly friendly.

Quite suddenly, sooner than he was expecting, he felt hands on his shoulders, halting his progress. He turned around and was faced with Draco Malfoy, along with two extremely heavy set men, who each had one hand on a shoulder, preventing him from moving.

Remus attempted a small smile. "Master Malfoy. To what do I owe this unexpected pleasure?"

Draco returned the smile, but his held no trace of warmth.

"Let's just say we're having a little trouble with something and need your... er... _expertise_."

"Well, gentlemen, I'd love to be of help but I'm really rather busy today. Perhaps another time." He tried to pull away but the two large men held on tighter, digging their fingers into his shoulders.

"Well, I'm afraid we need your help _now_." Draco pulled something out of his pocket and held it to Remus' chest. "Now," he breathed, leaning in closer, "we can do this the easy way"

Remus spat at Draco contemptuously.

"Ok, then. The hard way." He replaced the steel dagger he was holding with a gleaming silver one, holding the tip against Remus' heart.

Tonks was almost upon them when one of the men struck out with a fist, catching her on her cheek. She fell to the ground with a soft thud.

She was the last thing Remus saw before he was whisked away.

They used a portkey to arrive at their destination, a huge old manor house, grey stone and sculpted gargoyles.

He was taken to a dark room deep below the house. The stone walls were damp and slimy looking. There was only a chair in the centre of the room. Remus was shoved into the chair while Draco waved his wand, making topes tighten around Remus, holding him tight.

"Such hospitality." Remus stated, his eyes wary.

"I try to supply the best for my... guests." Draco came close and crouched down before him. "We want your cooperation, werewolf. How did Black return through the veil?"

Remus' eyes flew wide open. How on earth did Malfoy know that Black was back in the first place? Not only that, how did he know he had something to do with it?

"I wouldn't tell you, even if I could."

Draco straightened, fingering the silver dagger. "Look,' he said to his companions, 'the dog wants to play games."

The others snickered foolishly.

Remus held his head high, staring Malfoy in the eye.

Malfoy grinned, his eyes flashing malevolently.

"Time for round one."

Malfoy placed the tip of the silver dagger a fraction away from Remus' throat. "Are you going to tell us what we want to know?" he asked again.

Remus dared not move a muscle. "How can I tell you what I don't know myself?"

Malfoy suddenly nudged the blade forward, very slightly nicking Remus' skin. Remus hissed in pain as Malfoy stared in fascination at the tiniest wisp of smoke rising from the wound.

"Interesting," he mused, sheathing the dagger. "_Very_ interesting indeed. Silver _does_ hurt you."

"You should have paid better attention in class, Malfoy," Remus spat, "or you'd have known that already."

Malfoy stood up, rocking back and forth on his heels, surveying the man (_not man_, he reminded himself, _werewolf_) glaring up at him so defiantly. Suddenly he pulled out his wand, pointing it straight at Remus. "_Crucio_!" he shouted.

It was as if the very marrow in his bones was afire, a pure white-hot agony under which he writhed, worse than any transformation had ever been. It was as if the blood in his veins had been suddenly replaced with boiling lava. His bones felt as though they were being pulverized under staggering amounts of pressure. He threw back his head, his eyes bulging in their sockets as he howled soundlessly. It was a pain beyond words, beyond measure, beyond comprehension.

And, just as suddenly, it was gone.

Remus' head dropped forward onto his chest as he strove to catch his breath.

Malfoy watched him critically, eyes glittering with pure malice. "Imagine," he drawled, "what that would have felt like had I _really_ meant it."

"You miserable bastard!" Remus choked out. He felt as though he'd been chewed up and spat back out. "I'll take my secrets to the grave rather than give them up to you."

Malfoy shrugged. "All in good time, beast," he said. He slowly circled Remus' chair, pulling the steel dagger from beneath the folds of his cloak. "The Dark Lord was returned by the sacrifices of flesh, blood and bone"

Remus tensed, waiting.

A malicious grin spread across Malfoy's pointed features as he stood again in front of Remus.

"Let's start with blood," he said, and slid the dagger along the inside of Remus' forearm.


	9. Revenant Ch9

**Chapter Nine**

"I _can't_ not help!" Sirius yelled. White with fury, he paced the length of the kitchen relentlessly. "It's _Remus_! I _have_ to do this!"

"He matters to all of us, Sirius," Dumbledore said gently. "But at this moment we don't even know where he's been taken. And we certainly cannot afford to have you sighted and most likely arrested."

Sirius flung himself heavily into a kitchen chair. "Fat lot of good I'm doing _here_," he grumbled.

Dumbledore stood up. "I am returning to Hogwarts. I will alert the Order members from there. Sirius," he said, fixing a stern gaze on the fidgeting man, "I do expect you to remain here, at least until a plan of action has been formulated."

Sirius harrumphed, glowering as Dumbledore tossed a generous handful of Floo powder into the fireplace and stepped into its flames.

"Now you know how I felt," Harry said, "when I thought Voldemort had you at the Department of Mysteries."

They sat in silence. And waited.

Within half an hour, the kitchen at Grimmauld Place was full nearly to overflowing with Order members. Most of the Weasleys were there, save for Ron (who was still safely ensconced in St Mungo's), Ginny (who, at sixteen, was still considered underage in the wizarding world), and Percy (who no longer considered himself a member of the family). Bill and Charlie were there, however, and were both thoroughly delighted to be reacquainted with Sirius.

"Wish it was under better circumstances, mate," Bill said, clapping a hand on Sirius' shoulder.

_If one more person calls me mate_, Sirius thought as he forced a sickly smile, _I shall scream_.

"Settle down, settle down," Dumbledore said, motioning for everyone to find a seat. "We've lost enough time as it is. Miss Tonks? Would you please?"

Tonks moved to stand beside Dumbledore, clearing her throat slightly. "The Death Eaters have kidnapped Remus Lupin," she said bluntly.

A collective gasp ran through the room.

Sirius noticed Snape sit up a bit straighter in his chair, eyes intent on Tonks, and he nearly bit his tongue in half in an effort to keep his cool. _Remus,_ he told himself. _I'm being good for Remus_.

Tonks' voice trembled as she continued. "One was Draco Malfoy. There were two others with him, but I don't know their names. Malfoy threatened Remus with a knife of some kind. It looked like silver."

"What direction did they go?" Kingsley asked from the corner.

Tonks shook her head. "No idea. They had a Portkey."

"If a Malfoy's involved," Arthur said, "they may be at the family home. We'll need to send some reconnaissance."

"Excellent idea, Arthur," said Dumbledore.

"I want to go," Sirius said abruptly.

Dumbledore sighed, shaking his head. "Sirius, we've been over this..." he began.

"Wait," Harry interrupted. "Why can't he go? I know I might be out of line for suggesting this, but... What about Padfoot?"

"It's an idea," Dumbledore said thoughtfully, as Sirius shot Harry a grateful look. "But his Animagus form is known to far too many as it is."

"Harry's right," Sirius said stubbornly. "A dog's nose is really sensitive. I'll be able to scent him out. Besides," he added, "you could pair me with Tonks. She's the best at disguise."

Dumbledore nodded. "Very well. I'd certainly rather you went with Miss Tonks than alone. But Sirius..." His eyes took on a mischievous twinkle. "You'll have to act like a proper dog. You do understand to what I refer, don't you?"

"Oh... Oh, no," Sirius said, adamant. "No leash!"

"_And_ a collar," snickered Harry.

"That's just evil!" Sirius exclaimed, glaring at Harry.

Dumbledore chuckled. "But will you do it?"

Sirius nodded. "For Remus? You know I will."

"Come _on_," Tonks muttered as Padfoot stopped to lift his leg at yet another fire hydrant. "You don't have to stop at every bloody one, you know." She'd turned her usually vibrant hair dull grey and grizzled, changed her smooth youthful skin to wrinkled. Being a Metamorphmagus had its advantages, she knew, but the old lady disguise was her least favourite.

_Maybe it's this revolting red handbag_, she mused, _or this godawful hat. Whoever thought stuffed vultures were a fashion accessory? I feel like Neville Longbottom's grandmother_.

Padfoot huffed in a very doggy fashion as he trotted along beside her. They'd had a terrible row over the collar, but finally he'd managed to be placated with one made of real leather with several copper studs embedded in it.

Finally Tonks stopped.

"This is it," she whispered. "Dumbledore got the address from Malfoy's school records. D'you smell anything? Um, or anyone?"

Padfoot sat back on his haunches, sniffing the chilly air. He smelled snow (very frosty)... He smelled Tonks (sort of like vanilla, but not)... He smelled apples cooking somewhere (_very_ cinnamony indeed)...

He smelled Remus. And blood.

He barked softly, once, and whined as Tonks pulled gently on his leash.

"No," she hissed. "Back to Headquarters, you bloody impatient mutt! We don't know what we'd be walking into!" She dragged him into a nearby alley so he could change back to human form in relative privacy.

"Tonks!" he said urgently. "We found him! We can't just leave!"

"We need backup," she said firmly, and although he hated to admit it, Sirius knew she was right.

They Disapparated.

The house was at last blessedly still.

Remus opened his eyes with considerable effort, gazing blearily around the dreary dungeon. He was lightheaded, weak, for the wound in his arm was still dripping into a pool onto the floor.

Every inch of him ached from the several bouts of the Cruciatus curse.

He had had experience with Voldemort and thought no-one could be as evil, but as he sat there in the utmost agony, he thought Draco Malfoy came close... very, _very_ close.

Draco had taken more than enough blood and disappeared. That was at least an hour ago.

Now Remus was hoping that any time now someone would come to help him.

_Expecting Sirius?_

Remus felt his heart clench with pain.

Why would he even bother after the way he had talked to him. But as he sat in the cold, dark, damp room he couldn't help but wonder if maybe Sirius had been right. _Was_ Snape involved at all in his abduction?

Surely Dumbledore's judgment had not been wrong...

_But he is only human._

It was a fact that many kept forgetting. Like Harry, Remus fully expected Dumbledore to be able to do anything. That he was infallible...

Remus coughed, and the pain it wrought through his body almost caused him to cry out.

And then he heard footsteps coming down the stairs. The latch was pulled open and Malfoy swept into the room. The look on his face was one of pure rage, but his voice was eerily calm.

"So..." he breathed, circling Remus' chair like a vulture. "Phase one didn't work. But no matter. That just means it's time for round two."

Remus desperately wanted to say something, but his throat was so raw from his screaming that no sound would emerge.

Malfoy leaned in closer. "Unless there's something you want to tell me?"

Remus croaked a swear word at him.

Malfoy slapped him around the face.

"Alright then. If you have nothing useful to contribute..." He unsheathed the steel dagger once more, running its tip along Remus cheek, enjoyment written over his face.

Remus was disgusted by Malfoy. It was as if he was getting pleasure from torturing another human being...

_But of course, he thinks I am nothing but an animal._

"_Flesh_," Malfoy whispered against his ear, his breathing coming in short hard breaths.

He ran the knife down Remus' neck, along his shoulder and back to the already injured arm.

It happened in a white hot, burning, piercing instant.

Remus couldn't fight back the scream that issued from him. Though only a sliver had been taken the pain seemed to sink straight into his very bones. His arm was alight with fire...he was surely going to die...and then he blacked out.

_He dreamt of Sirius. Dreamt he was lying by a cool stream, their limbs entangled, whispered words of love shared between them._

_It was a park somewhere in the city. People threw glances their way but there were no Ministry officials swooping down on them...Sirius was free._

It was so sweet a dream that he wanted to stay in it forever, but inevitably those footsteps sounded again, waking him abruptly.

He only had the faintest glimmer of hope that it could be someone to rescue him, and it was dashed as he saw Malfoy enter the room once more.

He was unsure how much time had passed, but the room was considerably darker than it had been last time. From the stillness it must be deep night.

"Any last requests werewolf?" Malfoy spat, circling the chair once more, one gleaming dagger in each hand, one steel, one silver.

"Guess it didn't work," Remus croaked, his throat dry and sore.

Malfoy narrowed his eyes, crouching before him. "You _know_ how Black came back; you are the reason he came back! Now tell me how you did it!"

"He came back by a power you will never understand," Remus rasped, eyes glazed with pain but defiant.

"Oh, I understand _many_ forms of power..." The silver blade was traced along his cheek gently, just enough to issue a small wisp of smoke.

Remus gritted his teeth but made no sound.

"Now tell me, or its time for round three."

"Go to hell!" Remus shouted.

Malfoy screwed up his face in anger and dove the silver blade into Remus' already damaged beyond belief arm.

The pain was so closely related to the cruciatus curse that Remus thought for the first time that he was actually going to die.

And that smile on Malfoy's face...

He twisted the blade.

Remus cried out as bone splintered, cried for Sirius, cried for his mother long gone to her grave. Cried for anyone to hear him and release him from his agony, even death.

And as he blacked out again, there came more footsteps on the stairs outside.

"I thought I told you never to disturb me in here, Nott," Malfoy said over his shoulder, as he wiped the bloody silver blade against Remus' trousers. "Perhaps you need a little reminder who's in charge? I've got the bone fragment though; we can..." He broke off as he turned around, eyes widening in recognition. "_You_."

"_Expelliarmus_!" Tonks and Kingsley yelled together, wands outstretched, as Dumbledore entered behind them. But they weren't quite quick enough; Malfoy had immediately Disapparated.

"_Oh_. Oh, my god," Tonks breathed, turning to Remus, who still sprawled unconscious and bleeding in the chair. She tried not to gag on the sickly stench of burnt flesh hanging in the air.

Dumbledore knelt next to the chair. At a whisper from him, Remus' bonds melted away and he slid bonelessly to the floor. Dumbledore caught him gently. "Quickly now," he said to the others. "Is the Portkey ready, Kingsley? We were right in thinking Remus would be in no shape to Apparate."

"Right here," Kingsley said, holding out a grimy, half-unraveled mitten. "Everyone catch hold now." He held one of Remus' hands up to the mitten while Dumbledore activated the Portkey.

"Three... two... one..." Dumbledore counted off softly as they all instinctively braced for the impact.

In seconds they were back at Grimmauld Place and carrying Remus into the kitchen where Harry and Sirius waited impatiently with Snape. All three men leapt out of their chairs as the rescue party entered.

"Put him here," Dumbledore instructed, as Kingsley gently laid Remus on the long table, "so we can see the extent of his injuries."

It was very bad. Remus' right arm had essentially been flayed open from elbow to wrist, the flesh of it blackened and burnt by the silver blade. Both wrists and ankles were raw and chafed from the too-tight ropes.

"Poppy's on her way," Snape announced, pulling his head out of the fire.

"Sirius?" Tonks asked, placing a hand on his arm. "Are you alright?" He shook her arm off impatiently and stumbled from the room, one trembling hand over his mouth.

Harry edged closer. "What happened to him?" he whispered.

"Silver," said Dumbledore. "But we may be able to save his arm yet. Perhaps you could go see to Sirius?"

Harry nodded, looking rather relieved to have an excuse to exit the kitchen.

Sirius leaned back against the cool tiles of the bathroom and wondered if he was finished throwing up yet. He didn't want to move. If he moved, he would have to stand. If he stood, he would have to go back down to the kitchen.

_Silver_, he thought dully. _Must've been silver_. He'd seen silver damage Remus before, but never so badly as this. At Hogwarts, Remus had used stainless steel cutlery at meals, but there had been the rare occasion when it had gotten mixed up with the regular silver that everyone else used. Those had been minor burns to his fingertips, easily healed. But this... Remus' arm, where it wasn't charred, had looked almost liquefied, and broken bits of bone had poked up through it.

He leaned back over the toilet, retching again at the memory.

"Sirius?" came Harry's voice. "Can I come in?"

"Yeah," Sirius rasped, heaving himself to his feet, flushing the toilet as he shakily stood. He caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror above the sink and nearly didn't recognize his own reflection.

Harry edged in, wrinkling his nose.

"Sorry," Sirius said, dashing water over his face. The bathroom still stank sourly of vomit.

"Don't be," said Harry.

A full fifteen minutes went by before Sirius felt steady enough to go back downstairs. By that time Poppy had arrived, armed with enough Skele-Gro for the entire Order, and was busily bandaging Remus' arm. He was still unconscious.

"It's almost a blessing the silver burned him," she said to Dumbledore. "The cauterization kept him from bleeding to death." She patted the last of the bandaging into place. "He should be right as rain in a few days, but he'll need some... ah... special restoratives."

"I have that covered," Snape said smoothly, dusting himself off as he stepped out of the fire. "I had only to retrieve a few items from my private stores."

Pomfrey nodded her approval. "He'll be in good hands, then," she said.

Sirius blanched. "_He's_ in charge of Remus' recovery?"

"Galling, isn't it Black?" Snape sneered. He began rummaging through the bag he was carrying. "Silver's a poison to him; you must know that. The bones can be regrown easily enough, the flesh will heal... but the taint of that poison must be neutralized."

"I know," Sirius said quietly. He stepped over to the table, reaching out to smooth back Remus' hair. "I love him, you know."

"Don't remind me."

Sirius glanced up at Snape. _I'm being good for Remus_, he reminded himself. _I can do this for Remus._

"Please, Severus," he said, swallowing his pride once and for all. "Help him."

Remus fluttered in and out of consciousness throughout the night. Finally, in the early hours of the morning, he awoke fully, though didn't open his eyes at first.

He lay there, dreading hearing Malfoy's voice again, and was more than a little shocked to hear Snape beside him, speaking softly, kindly.

"You need to sit up a little, Lupin. Sip this."

Remus finally opened his eyes and allowed Snape to help him into a more upright position so he could take a sip from the goblet offered to him. It tasted awful, burning his throat, but he was so thankful to be away from that place that he would drink anything right now.

"Sirius," he croaked, trying to sit up more, but Snape pushed him back onto the pillow.

"You rest. I will get him."

Remus lay back, still trying to blink the remnants of sleep from his eyes, his head still reeling that Snape was being so kind to him...

_Was I really that close...to death?_

Hurried footsteps approached and next thing he knew Sirius had dropped to his knees next to his bed, grasping his left hand gently. Remus only just noticed with surprise that his right arm was heavily bandaged.

"Re... Thank Merlin." Sirius leaned over to kiss his brow tenderly.

Remus was more than a little surprised to see silver tears threatening to escape from Sirius' eyes.

"Hey, it's ok. I'm alright."

Sirius was running a hand through Remus' hair, his hand shaking and his face pale and wan as if he hadn't slept all night which, Remus mused, he probably hadn't. "I'm so sorry, Re."

"For what?"

"For..._everything_. Fighting with you, getting angry with Snape, fighting with you..." he let his hand fall to the bed, his fingers now tracing the pattern of the blanket.

Remus raised his hand to stroke Sirius' cheek tenderly. "It's ok. I'm sorry too. Sirius?"

"Yes?"

"What happened? I mean... with Malfoy..."

Remus had never seen such a look of hate on Sirius' face before. It had suddenly contorted into a grotesque mask, his hand on the bed tightening into a fist. "The little bastard got away...but when I get my hands on him..."

Remus could tell quite well what Sirius would do to Malfoy. Even _he_ would love to hurt him, and he was usually one for peace. He stifled a yawn, and Sirius looked at him, concerned.

"You're still tired. Get some sleep."

"Stay with me?" Remus held out his hand once more and Sirius took it gently.

"Always, Re." Sirius bent and brushed his lips over Remus', smiling at the contented sigh that escaped from him. "Merry Christmas Re."

"Good, I didn't miss it. Oh!" He tried to sit up, but Sirius pushed him back down.

"What is it?"

"Your present... I had it on me, but I don't know..."

"Is this it?" Sirius took a brightly wrapped small box from the bedside table. Remus smiled, falling back onto the pillow.

"Yes, that's it. Open it."

"Now? Are you sure?"

"Of course I'm sure. Open it," he repeated and closed his eyes.

Grinning, Sirius pulled off the neatly tied bow, and then eased back the paper. Soon, nestled in his palm was a small jewelry box. Lifting the lid, Sirius smiled.

Sitting on a bed of black velvet was a silver necklace... stainless steel, actually... and dangling from it were military dog tags. Reproductions, of course, but Sirius still grinned at the irony. Pulling it from the box, he noticed the tags had been engraved. One read 'SBRL'; the second stated simply 'forever yours'.

Touched beyond measure, Sirius leant to give Remus a grateful kiss, but Remus had already fallen asleep.

"I'll thank you later," he whispered, putting the necklace on immediately, and settling in the chair next to the bed, listening contentedly to his mate's soft breathing.


	10. Revenant Ch10

**Chapter Ten**

_Wake up._

_Sirius._

_Sirius, wake up_.

"I _am_ awake," he mumbled thickly.

"No, you aren't," Remus laughed. "Open your eyes, you prat."

Sirius obediently opened his eyes, blinking several times as he tried to clear his sleep-fogged mind. "What are you doing up?" he asked, frowning. "Thought you were supposed to be in bed."

Remus grinned, sitting down on the edge of the bed. "I don't know what Severus made for me," he said happily, "but it's one fantastic potion. I feel better than I have in ages." He reached over and squeezed Sirius' hand. "Much of that's because _you're_ here," he added softly.

"You look amazing," Sirius said, eying Remus up and down.

Remus flushed slightly. "Oh, this..." he said, fingering the open collar of his shirt. "It's just comfortable." The black button-down shirt was only cotton, but Sirius recognized it as an old favourite of Remus', worn through years of use to unbelievable softness. He'd tucked it neatly into his black trousers, but had left the top couple buttons undone. His hair just brushed his shirt collar, and his eyes shone.

"How's the arm?" Sirius asked, finally hauling himself out of the chair for a good stretch. "And what time is it, by the way?"

"Sore as hell," Remus admitted, "and just gone eleven." He moved his arm slightly and Sirius could see the edge of the thick bandages poking out from Remus' right sleeve. "I sneaked a peek at it when Poppy came by to change the dressings earlier. Not a pretty wound. It'll scar, and badly, but I'm told it'll heal well underneath."

"Malfoy's not going to get away with any of this," Sirius promised.

"Sirius?" said Remus. "I woke up in a rather good mood. I don't want to sully it by thinking about Death Eaters."

"But..."

Remus held up his hand. "Stop it, Sirius. This is what's going to happen. You're going to go shower and change. Then you and I are going to go downstairs and enjoy a perfectly lovely Christmas dinner."

Sirius grinned. "You win. That reminds me, though; I still have to wrap your present." He gave Remus a quick peck on the cheek. "And later," he whispered, "I'll thank you properly for _my_ gift."

"I certainly hope so," Remus said, smiling.

Hours later, after Molly's excellent meal had been devoured and the presents exchanged, after the multitude of Weasleys had Floo'd back to the Burrow and Harry had gone for a walk with Tonks, the lovers were finally alone.

Sirius toyed with the bottom edge of his new navy jumper. "I've only been back a few days," he said, astonished. "How in the the world does Molly knit so bloody fast?"

Remus laughed. "I don't really know. Harry seems to get one every year, too."

"Did you see what Harry gave me?" Sirius asked, visibly brightening at the mention of his godson.

"Only about fifty times," joked Remus as Sirius picked the small charmed model of a scruffy black dog off a side table.

"Look," Sirius said, still utterly enthralled with the gift. He poked it with a finger as it walked around his outstretched palm. "He got me _Padfoot_!"

"And here I thought _one_ Padfoot was plenty..."

Sirius stuck out his tongue, setting the dog back on the table. "Cheeky git," he said fondly.

"By the way," Remus said, swallowing the piece of chocolate in his mouth, "this is _excellent_ chocolate. How'd you manage to get your hands on real Belgian chocolate when you're supposed to be cooped up in here?"

Sirius chewed on his bottom lip. "I... erm... had to ask Tonks to pick it up," he said with a sigh. "It's not really what I wanted to get you, but... "He shrugged. There wasn't much point in belaboring his lack of freedom.

Remus brought his mate's hand to his lips, kissing the fingertips gently. "I love it. And you. And we _will_ clear your name, Sirius. It's only a matter of time."

Sirius scowled. "Not with Fudge heading the Ministry, we won't."

"But... That's right, I guess you wouldn't know, would you?" Remus said. "Fudge is gone; it's Amelia Bones in charge now. Has been for about six months now."

"_Really_?" Sirius was astounded. "She's the one who was so fair to Harry at his trial a couple years back, wasn't she? If she's the new Minister... Re, I might actually have a chance!"

Remus settled back on the sofa, snuggling into Sirius' shoulder as the other man draped an arm around him. "That you might," he agreed. "Dumbledore said he'd be by later on. He had the Christmas feast at Hogwarts, you know."

"Mmm," said Sirius, "those were such good feasts..." He leaned over slightly, nuzzling Remus' ear. "Do we have time?"

Remus turned until he was facing Sirius, gazing into the smoky grey of his eyes. He opened his mouth to speak, but never got out the words as Sirius kissed him, gently at first, then more firmly as they both melted into the embrace. Sirius traced Remus' lips with his tongue until they softly parted, dipping into that honeyed mouth over and over as passion overtook him. Remus groaned underneath him as Sirius flicked his tongue slowly along the line of his jaw, up to his ear then back again, nuzzling finally at the base of his throat.

"This... _this_," murmured Remus, arching his head back as Sirius' deft tongue slid along the hollow of his throat where his shirt buttons had been left undone, "is what I wanted to unwrap the _most_."

"Not interrupting, am I?"

Sirius' head snapped up so quickly that he bumped Remus' jaw.

"_Ow!"_ Remus yelped, biting his tongue. "Um, Headmaster... erm... hello..."

Sirius brushed his hair out of his eyes and tried very hard to look as if he wasn't completely mortified. "How was the Feast?"

"Excellent, as always," Dumbledore said cheerfully. "I have something for the both of you. It's technically addressed to Remus, but it does involve you, Sirius, as well."

Sirius and Remus exchanged a puzzled glance.

"You may find it to be of use," Dumbledore continued, handing a thick sheaf of papers to Remus. "It was entrusted to me by our late Miss Granger. I daresay you already have some idea what it is," he added with a twinkle in his eye. "I _am_ sorry I didn't have time to wrap it."

Sirius and Remus glanced at each other and then at Dumbledore before finally turning their attention to the small stack of papers sitting in Remus' lap.

The papers were rather dog-eared, as if they had been read and reread many times over. There were small lines of handwriting down the sides, making footnotes and comments. The heading though, was neat and bold.

_Case For the Mistrial of Sirius Black._

"I think she meant _non_ trial," Sirius murmured from his side. Remus shushed him quickly, looking back at Dumbledore.

"Sir, I don't know what to say..." His eyes flicked down the first page, noting the accuracy and detail that had been put into the information.

Dumbledore smiled gently. "The look on both of your faces is enough... though I wouldn't say no to a quick nip of firewhisky before I turn in."

Sirius rushed to pour drinks for them all, nearly spilling it in his haste.

_Dumbledore settled into a chair, a benign smile still on his face. Sirius took a huge gulp of his drink, but Remus was still staring at the papers, sifting through them with a look of childlike wonder._

Hermione had obviously taken much care and precision with her work, as she had always done. Everything was neatly labelled, important notes were highlighted... It was a dream come true! With a case like this behind them, there was no way Sirius wouldn't be cleared.

Sirius would be finally free...

Remus glanced at his mate, casting a warm smile at him.

"Do... Do you think we might get a hearing sometime soon?" Remus asked Dumbledore softly.

"I will speak to Madam Bones in the morning if you wish."

Remus grinned, not noticing the way Sirius looked at him with his face lit up like that. Desire was written all over him.

Remus may not have noticed, but Dumbledore did. Taking a last sip of his drink, he stood.

"Well, dear boys, I must get back to the castle before Peeves decides to terrorize the first-years again. Have an enjoyable evening."

"We will," Sirius murmured, as Remus bid Dumbledore goodnight.

Soon it was just the two of them in the fire-lit room.

Remus picked up the papers again, gazing at them reverently. "Just think Sirius... Perhaps only in a few days... you'll be free."

Sirius stared into his firewhisky. Freedom felt strange and foreign to him; it was hard to believe. And no matter _who_ was in charge now, he had lost complete faith in the Ministry long ago.

"Sirius?"

"If it happens, Re, it will be wonderful."

"_If?_ Hermione has excelled herself yet again! These notes, this... this... The whole thing is just _amazing_! If this doesn't gain your freedom, nothing will."

Sirius couldn't stay somber when his mate was so excited. He indulged Remus with a rare grin. "Always the same, hey, Re? Finding the good in everyone. Even me."

Remus slowly put down the papers and went to kneel before Sirius, placing a hand on his knee. "I never had to look far, Padfoot. No matter what you ever thought of yourself, I didn't."

"I know. That's one of the things that made me fall in love with you."

"Oh?" Remus said coyly. "What are the other things?"

Sirius gave a growl and lifted Remus up onto his lap, wrapping his arms firmly around the man before capturing his mouth with his own. Tongues twisted and teased, tasting deeply of each other before they pulled apart, breathless.

Remus smiled. "Ok, I'm a good kisser. What else?"

He shifted to straddle Sirius, deliberately rubbing himself against Sirius' obvious arousal. Sirius growled again, his hands quickly dipping under Remus' shirt and trailing down to cup his backside.

Remus leaned into him, whispering hoarsely "And I have a cute ass. What else?"

Sirius laughed. "I don't recall_ saying_ it was cute. Of course," he added, "now that you mention it..."

Remus cocked his head suddenly towards the door. "Hear that?" he whispered.

"No." Sirius shook his head. "Oh, wait. I think it's just Harry and Tonks returning, though. Should we tell them our news now or later?" he asked, gesturing at the stack of Hermione's notes.

"Later," Remus said huskily. "I think right now I'd like to... ah, _unwrap_ this present somewhere a little more private..."

Sirius grinned. "Race you!"

They drowsed in bed, sated and spent, the blankets draped loosely over them. Sirius lay on his side, one arm curled possessively across Remus' chest, while Remus lay on his back, staring thoughtfully up at the ceiling.

"Padfoot," he said. "Have you thought at all about what you'll do once you're a free man again?"

Sirius mumbled something into Remus' shoulder.

Remus shifted onto his side, mindful of his bandaged arm, so he could face his mate. "Sorry," he said dryly. "Didn't quite catch that."

Sirius smiled sleepily. "I said I'd like to go for a walk."

"A walk?"

"A walk," Sirius clarified, "outside in the fresh air, with you at my side. And as a human, _not_ as Padfoot." He wrinkled his nose and added, "Besides, the last time I went as Padfoot, Dumbledore made me wear a collar. _And _a leash."

Remus laughed. "I'd have loved to have seen that!"

"Don't count on it," Sirius snorted. "The collar – it's a possibility. The leash? Forget it!" He fell silent, and the soft snores a few minutes later indicated Sirius had fallen asleep.

"Happy Christmas, my love," Remus whispered as he gently kissed the other man's forehead, and closed his own eyes.

"I don't know why you insist on meeting in this hellhole," Snape hissed, trying to stamp a bit of warmth into his half-frozen feet before sitting down across from Malfoy.

Draco shrugged. "It's convenient."

"For you, perhaps." Snape hunched forward, dropping his voice to barely more than a whisper. "Why did you not inform me of your plans for the werewolf?"

"Do you inform me of _your_ plans?" Draco asked, watching the lamplight reflect off the firewhisky as he swirled it around in his glass. "I wasn't aware it mattered to you what became of the creature."

Snape glowered at the young man. "That beast?" he said. "No. But had you waited, you might have known that the Veil doesn't appear to work in the traditional ways. What brought the Dark Lord back before is not necessarily going to work for you now."

Draco pounced. "And how _does_ the Veil work, then?"

Snape shook his head. "It isn't known," he muttered, "but nothing... ah, _material_... from the werewolf was used. As far as I know, he wasn't even present – _no_ part of him."

"I went through all that for nothing?" Draco couldn't hide the disgust from his voice. "Risked our entire operation, and for _nothing_?" He tossed back his firewhisky with practiced ease.

Snape stood roughly up from his chair. "Perhaps if you had not withheld information, you might have saved yourself some trouble. I'm not fond of surprises." With a swirl of his cloak, he disappeared into the frigid night.

"Oh, I don't know," Draco mused, half-aloud. "I think you'd be _quite_ surprised by what I withhold."

The day after Christmas dawned cold and clear, the sky a brilliant blue unmarred by clouds. The bright early morning sunlight bounced off the previous evening's snow, sparkling and scintillating in a thousand shards of light.

Sirius, who – for once – had woken up in a tolerably good mood, took one look out the window and decided Remus had slept far more than enough.

"_Moony, Moony, Moony," he chanted softly, punctuating each word with a nibble along Remus' jawline. "Time to get up."_

Remus groaned, rolling onto his stomach and pulling a pillow over his head. "It's too bloody early, Padfoot," he mumbled, conveniently forgetting that just the other day he'd bemoaned waking up alone in the bed. "Wake me at a decent hour."

"It _is_ a decent hour," Sirius insisted, bouncing lightly on the mattress next to Remus. "At least, I think it is."

Remus swatted blindly at him. "Stop bouncing, you mangy mutt!"

"Who d'you think you're calling mangy?" Sirius said in a mock-injured tone. He did stop bouncing, though, swiftly straddling Remus' buttocks. Most of the blankets had migrated to the foot of the bed during the night, and the thin sheet remaining did nothing to disguise his morning erection. He rubbed lightly against Remus' arse as he admired its slender contours. Leaning forward, he began nuzzling a path along Remus' spine, grinning delightedly at the other man's quiet moans of pleasure. "If you get up, I promise to – _hey_!"

In one swift and sudden movement, Remus had neatly flipped Sirius onto his back, and was now straddling him instead. He'd captured Sirius' wrists with his hands, holding them above Sirius' head. "Promise to what, Padfoot?" he crooned, rocking his own growing hardness against Sirius.

Sirius groaned, thrusting his hips upward. They were both still naked from the night before, but Remus had somehow maneuvered to keep the sheet between them, and the friction of Remus' cock against his through the thin cloth was maddening.

_Bloody sheet, _he thought, trying to struggle out from under it.

Remus ground firmly against his mate, effectively keeping the sheet in place. "Down, puppy," he laughed. "Teach _you_ to wake a werewolf from a sound sleep." He leaned down, moving his tongue in slow circles around Sirius' nipples, occasionally nipping one which elicited a breathless gasp from Sirius.

"Re, you bloody tease," Sirius groaned. "I want to feel _you_ next to me, not the bloody bedclothes!"

"I know you do," grinned Remus, working his tongue gradually along Sirius' throat to his ear. He bit the lobe gently and whispered, "But I think you deserve a bit of punishment for waking me up..." He let go of Sirius' wrists just long enough to intertwine their fingers, still keeping Sirius from using his hands.

"Kiss me, at least," Sirius said throatily, turning his head just enough so that Remus could do so. As Remus' mouth covered his, Sirius' lips parted, allowing Remus to slip his tongue delicately inside. _He's tasting me,_ Sirius thought dazedly. All the blood seemed to have left his brain and centered itself much lower; he was achingly hard and Remus' relentless rubbing against him was so good, too good. He thrust incoherently up against his mate, pushing against that lovely hardness...

"Remus, I..." he gasped, and came suddenly, messily. A moment later, Remus did the same, kissing Sirius hard as he climaxed.

"Um... Good morning," Remus snickered into his love's shoulder as they both tried to catch their breath.

Sirius chuckled and wrapped his arms around his mate. "And a good morning to _you_," he said.


	11. Revenant Ch11

Chapter Eleven 

The house was certainly quieter after the rush of Christmas was over. Harry had returned to school, and the Weasleys had gone back to the Burrow to catch up on some things. Everyone, especially Harry, had been excited by their announcement of the evidence and case for Sirius, and Arthur had assured them that Madam Bones was definitely a fair woman.

It wasn't long before the first weekend after school had resumed for Hogwarts, and Remus and Sirius were surprised by a visit from Dumbledore, who asked to speak to Sirius in private for a few moments. Confused, but agreeable, Sirius followed Dumbledore out of the room, while Remus paced nervously in the kitchen.

What could Dumbledore have come to say? What was so important it couldn't be said via a letter?

_Damn it, why can't I hear what's going on? _Remus fumed, as he passed the fireplace for the seventh time.

Remus had to admit to himself that he was worried. Worried that it was some kind of bad news, worried that perhaps it had to do with Malfoy... He sighed, and grabbed hold of the back of a chair to try and stop himself from pacing. Going around and around the table was beginning to make himself dizzy. He threw a glance at the cabinet that held their firewhisky and was sorely tempted to grab a bottle. That would certainly give him something to do...

_Stop it! _Remus scolded himself, forcing his tense body down into the chair he had been holding, only to jump to his feet seconds later as he heard footsteps on the stairs.

Sirius and Dumbledore came into the kitchen and Remus couldn't fail to catch the look on Sirius' face. Tense, nervous... No. Scared.

"What's wrong?" Remus asked, automatically standing beside Sirius and laying a hand on his arm.

"We've got a date for the trial." The cheerfulness in Sirius' voice was forced, unnatural.

"Well...that's good. Isn't it?" He glanced quizzically at Dumbledore, who gave him a reassuring smile.

"It's excellent news, though it's not for another two weeks."

Remus smiled back. "That's not so bad, then. Time for me to review Hermione's notes, time for Sirius and I to prepare ourselves..." Remus voice trailed off as he again noticed the tense look on Sirius' face.

"There's one catch, Re." Sirius' voice was now only a fraction above a whisper, and his surprisingly strong grip forced Remus to take up his seat again. "This trial is for me to gain my freedom."

"Right." Remus agreed.

"So, until that time...I'm still a wanted man."

"What?!"

"The Ministry requires me to be... monitored... until the trial."

Remus frowned, not sure he quite followed what Sirius was trying to say. "What? Are you under house arrest or something?"

Sirius tried to give an amused smile, and failed miserably.

Dumbledore cleared his throat. "I am afraid part of the agreement states that Sirius be detained until his trial."

Remus felt his stomach sink through his feet, onto the cold stone floor. He knew he had gone pale. "Where?" he rasped.

"Azkaban," Sirius whispered.

"No!" Remus stood so quickly he had a head spin and had to steady himself for a moment before speaking again. "They can't do that! He's innocent! How can they lock him up in that god-awful place with no reason? No proof?"

"Re, calm down." Sirius laid a hand on Remus' shoulder but he threw it off angrily.

"We'll appeal the decision! We'll fight it. We'll go somewhere else..."

"I agreed to it, Remus."

"You..." Once more, Remus slumped into his seat, this time a picture of defeat. He hung his head, his hands feebly running through his hair.

"It's only two weeks, Re. I handled it for twelve years, and I can handle it again."

Dumbledore cleared his throat and Remus jumped. He had forgotten the headmaster was there.

"Well, I am afraid we should get going. The sooner we get there, the better the impression."

"Of course." Sirius agreed.

"_Now?_ You're just... leaving?" Remus was shocked when a shuddering breath escaped from him.

Sirius squatted before Remus, taking one cold hand in his. "Re, the time will go quickly... and afterwards... I'll be free."

Remus suddenly felt like the most selfish person alive. Sirius was about to go through a whole lot for his freedom, and Remus was acting like a spoiled brat. He faced Sirius, forcing a smile on his face. "I'll miss you, Padfoot."

"I'll miss _you_, Moony." Sirius leaned forward and brushed warm and gentle lips over Remus', then gave him a lingering gaze before straightening up. "Well. In two weeks, then."

Remus forced his smile wider. "In two weeks."

Sirius left with Dumbledore. Remus didn't move until he heard the click of the door above him. Then he went to the cabinet and grabbed himself that drink.

They didn't Apparate; they couldn't. The many wards on Azkaban prison prevented it. Instead, Dumbledore and Sirius boarded the small boat that was traditionally used to transport prisoners from the mainland to the island prison. It rather forcibly reminded Sirius of the Greek myth of being ferried across the river Styx to the realm of the dead.

_I may as well be dead, in there._ Sirius closed his eyes, swallowing back bile as the sea-swept rock gaol loomed suddenly out of the mists. He was freezing cold, his insides like ice, not from the damp chill rising off the sea nor from the rising wind splashing salt spray into his face, but from the weight of memories of this godforsaken place.

Dimly he felt Dumbledore's reassuring hand on his shoulder. _Two weeks. Two weeks. Fourteen days. For Remus. Two weeks. For my freedom. Two weeks. Fourteen days._

He hadn't realized he had been softly chanting the litany aloud until Dumbledore shushed him with a gentle squeeze to his shoulder.

"I _can't_," Sirius half-whimpered, recoiling instinctively as they disembarked. Azkaban hulked over them, dismal and forbidding and horribly familiar.

Dumbledore reached out and turned Sirius to face him, forcing Sirius to look directly into the Headmaster's bright blue eyes. "You _can_," Dumbledore said quietly. "Most of the Dementors are gone now, gone to join with Voldemort. And even so, you have advantages that other inmates do not."

"I do?"

"Have you forgotten you are an Animagus?" Dumbledore asked.

He_ had_ forgotten. The briefest of smiles crossed Sirius' face, blotted out almost immediately as he stared up at the damp rock walls of the wizard prison.

"It's time," Dumbledore said, and they went in. Sirius was barely aware of the formalities as he was escorted into Azkaban, too lost in his own despair to quite notice when he was taken from Dumbledore and brought deeper inside the gaol. He only blinked back to reality when he heard the distinct click of the lock swinging shut and he realized he was alone in the cell.

The damp of the sea crept in through the rock, smelling of rot and algae, of misery and hopelessness and insanity. Sirius sank to the filthy floor, his eyes slightly glazed.

_I dreamed I was with Remus again... I dreamed I was going to be free... I dreamed I saw Harry, looking just like James... I dreamed I had a hippogriff... I dreamed I was a dog, swimming in that cold, cold sea..._

In the distance, Sirius could hear another of the prisoners screaming wordlessly, the shrieks punctuated with a hysterical, sobbing sort of laughter. He shook his head, wondering vaguely who it was, why they'd been brought here, what they had done.

Some time later, Sirius realized that the screamer was himself.

Oh, it was such a _good_ dream he was having! He and Sirius were at the cottage again, the sun beating heavily down on them and Sirius' barklike laughter was pure music to his ears... Sirius wrapped Remus up in his arms but suddenly started shaking him...

Someone _was _shaking him. Someone was shaking him by the shoulders, hard, and if they didn't bloody well stop, he –

"Oh, Tonks... I'm so sorry," Remus croaked, wiping his mouth with the back of one hand. His head ached abominably and his stomach felt simply wretched.

Tonks sighed, glancing ruefully from the empty bottle on the table to her (_brand new!_ a voice in the back of her mind yelled) Muggle jeans which were now dripping with the remains of last night's firewhisky. "I guess I deserved that," she said, pulling out her wand. "Honestly, Remus, I couldn't even tell if you were _breathing_ or not, or I'd never have shaken you like that."

Remus fumbled for his own wand. "Here, let me," he said by way of apology, and quickly muttered a cleaning spell.

"Thanks," said Tonks. "I never did get the hang of all those cleaning thingummies." Narrowing her eyes, she surveyed Remus and asked, "Did you and Sirius have a fight?"

"No." Remus closed his eyes and slumped back in his chair. His stomach was still churning mercilessly. "He's not... He's not here."

"You should really be in bed," Tonks stated matter-of-factly. "Or better yet – got any hangover potions handy?"

Remus groaned. "I really don't know. I'm not much of a drinker, normally."

Tonks snorted behind her hand.

"Ow," Remus added. "Thinking hurts. Upstairs, maybe. Sirius may have left something like that in our room." He pulled himself haltingly to his feet, clutching desperately at the table's edge as the world spun sickeningly.

"Lean on me," Tonks commanded, and he did, gratefully. She carefully guided him out of the kitchen and up the stairs to his room, only knocking him into the wall twice. He flopped down on the bed, motioning feebly towards a night table with one hand.

"Check in there for hangover stuff."

Tonks pulled open the drawer. "Hmm," she said, holding up a small vial so she could read the label. "Merlin's Best Love Lube... Er, no, not it." She hastily dropped the vial back into the drawer, surreptiously wiping her hand on her jeans and pretending not to notice Remus' embarrassed blush.

"Ah, here we are," she said cheerfully after a moment. "Down the hatch, then."

It was awful, nearly as bad as the Wolfsbane, and for one brief, headspinning instant Remus thought he was going to throw up again, but the nausea passed almost immediately.

"Better?" Tonks asked kindly.

"Yes, thanks."

Tonks plopped down on the bed beside him. "So, where's my dear cousin?"

Remus buried his face in his hands. "God," he murmured. "Oh _god_, Tonks..."

"What? What is it?"

"Azkaban," Remus whispered. His face was ashen. "He's got a trial in two weeks, but the Ministry – the goddamn Ministry – insists he be... detained..." His voice sounded as bitter as he felt.

Tonks stared. "No..." she breathed. "And he went? He went willingly?"

Wordlessly Remus nodded. A lump had risen in his throat and he didn't trust himself to speak.

Tonks shuffled up closer to him, closing her small hand atop his. "It'll be alright," she whispered. "You'll see."

When Remus felt well enough to do so, they returned quietly to the kitchen. Remus tapped the kettle with his wand while Tonks rummaged for teabags. Once the tea was brewed, they say down at the worn table, cradling mugs in their hands, not speaking. There was nothing to be said.

They began to wait.

The days dragged slowly. Remus alternated between fits of depression and massive energy. During his depression he laid on the bed he and Sirius shared, hugging his arms around himself, trying to ward off the pain. He had forgotten about the separation pain from his lifemate. After Sirius had gone through the veil, Remus had drowned out any feeling with alcohol, but now Tonks had placed a locking curse on the cabinet. She sheepishly admitted she couldn't actually remember how she had done it, and Remus' late night attempts to open it had failed.

He had half-heartedly toyed with the idea of simply breaking the cabinet, but he wasn't _that_ desperate for the firewhisky.

What he _needed_ was Sirius.

When he wasn't in a bout of depression, he was working furiously, staying up late, poring over all the details of the notes Hermione had made, and flipping through books trying to find out more. More often than he cared to admit, he had fallen asleep at his desk.

Tonks tried to mother him, always complaining that he would make himself sick if he kept going the way he was, but Remus just growled out a response about not caring.

The trial was only days away when Remus found himself laying again on the bed, his gaze drawn out the window at the moon which was slowly getting rounder. The full moon would arrive only a day after the trial. Would Sirius be free to spend the lonely hours with him, help relieve them by his warm presence?

A tremor rushed through him and he pulled his knees to his chest, laying a weary chin on top of them. He had an urge to rush downstairs to double check the notes were all ready, but he knew they were as ready as they would ever be. He had done everything in his power and now all he could do was wait.

He shuddered again, forcing the pain aside. His mind was filled with images of Sirius. Was he alright? Was he in as much pain as he was himself? Was Azkaban affecting him as badly as it had before?

Remus knew there were not as many Dementors there as there used to be but still, even one would be bad enough...

He closed his eyes, imagining Sirius' touch, a soft hand running gently down his arm... a kiss in his ear.

Groaning softly, Remus laid down, trying to force sleep to arrive. Still, his gaze was drawn once more to the moon.

The first rays of sunlight hit Remus' face, and he silently cursed himself for not closing the curtains the night before. His head was pounding mercilessly, it felt like his mouth was full of sawdust, and his stomach ached relentlessly from his recent lack of food.

It was not, perhaps, the best way to start the day.

Remus sat up with a jolt, suddenly remembering today was the day of the trial.

He gagged as bile rushed into his mouth from the sudden pain in his head and, forcing it back, he swung his legs over the edge of the bed.

There was a tentative knock on his door and Tonks whispered through it, asking if he was awake.

"Yeah," Remus mumbled, yawning widely.

The door inched open and Tonks poked her head around it. Her eyes widened though as she saw him. "Remus, you look bloody awful!"

"Gee, thanks Tonks."

Tonks grinned sheepishly. "Honestly, though, Remus, you can't let Sirius see you looking like that." She gave a wink, stifling a laugh.

Remus smiled wryly. "Does it really look that bad?"

"Well..."

"Ok, ok. I get the picture."

Tonks left the room to start breakfast, and Remus staggered down the hall into the bathroom. The hot streaming water helped to ease most of his aches, but the place where he ached the most could only be soothed by his lifemate. Did he long for Remus as much as Remus needed him? Did he dream of being with his lifemate, fantasize about their life after today?

As much as Remus was reluctant to, he had to face the fact that the trial could go two ways.

_And what will happen if he's not cleared?_

Shaking aside that thought he finished showering, and then went back to his room to get dressed.

Tonks let out a low whistle as Remus entered the kitchen. He blushed, giving a wry smile.

"They won't have a hope in hell of keeping Sirius away from you dressed like that!" she giggled, heaping toast onto his plate.

Self-consciously, Remus tugged at the sleeve of his jacket, a soft caramel colour that accented his hair and eyes. He had on a matching pair of neatly pressed pants, and underneath, a snowy white shirt, on which he had left the top three buttons undone. His tawny hair was still damp, and it curled gently at the nape of his neck.

It wasn't long before breakfast was finished, and Tonks had placed the notes gently in his hands. A few moments later, the Weasley's arrived, and they made their way together to the Ministry.

... to be continued ...


	12. Revenant Ch12

Revenant Chapter 12 

Harry met up with Tonks just as she arrived at the Ministry. He was utterly shocked by her appearance.

"You look… _normal_!" he blurted, immediately reddening as he realized what he'd just said.

"Sorry," Tonks said, a little breathlessly. "I didn't think pink hair went well with trials." Her hair was a dark chocolate brown this morning, and shoulder-length, parted simply and with a soft, wispy fringe. It exactly matched the short suede jacket she wore. Harry eyed her appreciatively out of the corner of his eye as they squeezed into the phone box.

Tonks frowned. "Have they _shrunk_ this thing? Damn, I can't… Harry, can you reach…?"

Harry quickly reached behind her to press the numbers that alerted the Ministry to visitors.

"Welcome to the Ministry of Magic," squawked a disembodied voice. "Please state your name and purpose."

"Nymphadora Tonks and Harry Potter," Harry said. Tonks flinched at her given name. "We're here for the trial of Sirius Black."

Two lurid orange buttons slid out of the coin return, each bearing a name and the phrase "Defense Well-Wishers".

"How'd they know we're with the defense?" Tonks wondered aloud as they pinned the garish buttons to their coats.

Harry shrugged. "Dunno, Tonks," he quipped. "Must be magic."

Tonks snorted.

At the main desk, they waited impatiently in the short queue while the woman ahead of them was given directions to the Department of Magical Games and Sports.

The witch at the desk glanced blearily at their badges. "Courtroom Six," she sniffed before Harry could ask. She sounded badly in need of a good dose of Pepper-Up potion. "That way," she added, jerking her thumb toward the lifts. "Down one level and just to your right. NEXT!"

It didn't feel at all like a courtroom, Harry thought, as they skidded to a halt at the open door of Courtroom Six. When he'd been on trial two and a half years earlier for using magic in the presence of a Muggle, Harry had been in a gloomy, dungeon-like room several floors below. Sirius was on trial for his life and freedom, yet this courtroom was bright and airy. It felt spacious despite the throngs packing both the main floor and the balcony.

Tonks spotted Remus a moment later, and she threaded her way through to him, dragging Harry behind her. "Has it started?" she asked.

Remus shook his head. He looked, if anything, worse than he had a few short hours ago at Grimmauld Place. His face was shockingly pale, and his hands were trembling slightly. "God, I'm scared," he whispered to them. "What if I say something to screw this up?"

"You won't," Tonks said, trying to sound braver than she felt. Craning her neck, she scanned the front of the courtroom. "Is… Is he here?"

"They haven't brought him in yet," Remus said, nervously drumming his fingers against his leg. "And Dumbledore won't give me any real information."

A low, sonorous chime resonated throughout the room, and people immediately began taking their seats.

Tonks quickly gave Remus' hand a squeeze. "We'll be right over there with Arthur and Molly," she said, pointing.

"It'll be alright," Harry said, giving Remus a rough hug before following Tonks. He caught sight briefly of Susan Bones, who'd been a Hufflepuff in his year at Hogwarts. _Of course_, he realized_. Amelia Bones is her aunt. I remember her telling me that back when we were in the D.A. together._ He smiled to himself. If Amelia Bones was anything like her niece, she was bound to be fair. Slowly Harry began to relax a little.

"Will the defendant, Sirius Orion Black, please be brought in."

A door at the side of the courtroom opened, and Sirius entered, escorted by Dumbledore. He looked awful – thinner than ever, his slate eyes terrified. His hair, which had been getting rather shaggy the last time Harry had seen him, was roughly tied at the nape of his neck. It only seemed to accentuate the sharp lines of his cheekbones.

Even Dumbledore looked uncharacteristically grim as he led Sirius to a chair in the cleared area at the front of the courtroom.

Sirius kept his eyes lowered, not even sparing a glance for Remus.

Tonks muttered something angrily under her breath, and Molly patted her shoulder consolingly.

"Mr. Lupin."

Remus started visibly at the sound of his name. For a split second he turned impossibly paler, then stood, nervously straightening the edges of the notes on the table before him.

"Yes, Madam Bones," he said, hoping he sounded far more confident than he felt.

Amelia Bones eyed him over the square frames of her glasses. "Would you begin your statements, please?"

Remus stood, hands shaking as he clutched the notes close to him. With a jolt in his stomach and a sudden taste of vomit in his mouth, he saw Malfoy sitting smugly in a chair near the back.

_How dare he come here today!_

Forcing himself to concentrate, he turned to face Amelia Bones, clearing his throat before he began to speak.

"Madam Bones…" He could feel the icy eyes staring avidly at his back. He straightened and forced himself to speak more loudly. "…I have made sure a copy of notes and findings was made available for you."

"I have it, thank you." She gestured to the papers in front of her.

"Then I take it you have read through it. If so, then it is clear that Sirius Black had nothing to do with those vicious murders all those years ago. We have a confession from the man he was supposed to have killed…"

"With the witnesses of his confession unable to speak of it, or not in an unbiased frame to testify."

Remus swallowed, gritting his teeth. He thought this might come up, that Harry, Hermione, Ron, Sirius and himself had been the only ones to have seen Pettigrew. There was one quick way to clear that up, but it was a direction he was unwilling to go.

Madam Bones scrutinized him carefully. "We do understand that Mr. Black was not given a trial at the time, that the evidence against him was such that immediate imprisonment was the only logical answer. However," she said as she shuffled the papers in front of her again, 'Miss Granger has certainly done a thorough job of evening things up a lot. Such a brilliant young mind…" Her voice trailed of for a moment, but she quickly looked at Remus again. "Is there any solid evidence that Peter Pettigrew did, in fact, survive?

Sweat beaded Remus' forehead. He glanced quickly at Dumbledore, who looked serious, but gave a small nod.

It looked like the only way to save Sirius was to swallow his pride and do it. "I… I am willing to take Veritaserum to provide the necessary evidence."

All eyes were upon him, all except Sirius, who still was staring blankly ahead. Remus wished fleetingly that Sirius would give him the reassurance he needed. He was scared, he admitted, scared of what the serum could uncover.

A vial was brought in, and Remus was seated in a chair in front of Amelia Bones. A swallow, ice gripped his throat, and then grew almost uncomfortably hot. He felt as if he were floating pleasantly just above his chair.

"Your name is Remus John Lupin?" Madam Bones asked.

"It is."

"How long have you known Sirius Black?"

"Since our first year at Hogwarts."

"And what was your relationship to Mr. Black at Hogwarts?"

"He was my best friend."

"And Peter Pettigrew?"

"He was a friend as well."

Amelia sat back in her chair, her expression now grave. "What happened on the night of October thirty-first, nineteen eighty-one?"

"James and Lily Potter were murdered. Harry Potter survived. Voldemort was seemingly destroyed."

"What involvement did Sirius Black have with Voldemort?"

"Sirius Black detested Voldemort and all he stood for. He wanted to kill him."

"Was Black in league with Voldemort?"

"No."

"Did Sirius Black murder Peter Pettigrew?"

"No."

A whispering rustled through the stands. Some made sounds of disbelief. Remus didn't even blink.

"Did Sirius Black murder a street full of Muggles on that night?"

"No."

Madam Bones made a movement as if to say the questioning was over, but she suddenly turned back to face him.

"Before I make a decision, I wish to know one thing Mr. Lupin. We are all curious, how did Mr. Black return from the veil?"

_I don't want to say! Not with Malfoy here!!_

But the effects of the serum were too strong. "My love for Sirius brought him back. It protected him from death."

All whispering stopped. Remus was given the antidote and felt warmth spread through him. Then an icy cold that had nothing to do with potions gripped him. What had he done?

Madam Bones sat thoughtfully in her chair, considering Remus.

Finally, after what felt like forever, she spoke. "I believe we will need some more time to consider all the evidence. We will reconvene at nine o'clock tomorrow morning. Could the guards kindly escort Sirius back to Azkaban?"

"No!"

Remus was shocked by his own daring, but after watching the haunted look on Sirius' face he couldn't allow him to be sent back to that place, even for one more night.

"Mr. Lupin?" Madam Bones asked, her eyebrows raised quizzically.

"With all due respect, Madam Bones, why should Mr. Black be detained for yet another night in that godforsaken place? Surely one night… especially if it is to be his last…" Remus swallowed furiously to stop his voice from breaking. "It could be better spent… anywhere else?"

Again Madam Bones considered him.

The silence in the room was suffocating, and Remus chanced a quick glance at Sirius. He noticed finally, one small spark in the depths of his eyes, which had not been there before. It filled him with hope and desperation at the same time.

"Very well, Mr. Lupin, I agree with you that Mr. Black should be treated with respect. Therefore I will entrust him to you for this one night."

Remus blinked, surprised. Had he heard correctly?

"But one word of warning. If either of you do not appear in this room even one minute beyond nine o'clock tomorrow, the results will be severe."

It was still more than he could have hoped for.

"Thank you Madam Bones. I sincerely appreciate your generosity." He kept his voice free of emotion and turned to leave. Did Amelia give him a very small wink before he turned? He looked back, but her face was a somber mask again.

He shrugged it off and strode across the room, not daring to look at Sirius again until he was free of the stifling room.

Once out in the hall, he leaned back against the wall, breathing harshly and feeling like he'd just been run over by a hippogriff. The door beside him banged open, and Remus cringed as the throngs of trial onlookers began trickling out of the courtroom.

Remus stared at his feet, pretending he didn't notice either the surreptitious stares or the blatant gawking.

"Well, well," an all-too-familiar voice drawled.

"What do you want now, Malfoy?" Remus asked wearily, not really caring.

"I was so disappointed," Malfoy continued silkily, "when you left my home so suddenly the other night, when we hadn't finished our little… chat."

Remus' head snapped up, amber eyes blazing with fury. "When you tried to kill me, you mean?" he hissed. Under his robes, his badly scarred arm was finally unbandaged after two weeks of Snape's and Poppy's ministrations, but the new skin was still quite tender and sore.

"Now, now," Malfoy chided. "I did nothing of the sort. You're still very much alive, aren't you?"

If Arthur Weasley hadn't chosen that exact moment to step out of the courtroom and step between them, Remus was quite sure he would have done something regrettable. As it was, Arthur took one look at Malfoy's sneer and Remus' snarl, and seized the werewolf by the upper arm, dragging him off to one side. Remus thought he could still hear Malfoy's cold, mocking laugh long after he disappeared in the crowd.

"Everything all right?" Arthur asked him. "Remus. _Remus_. Look at me."

Remus forced himself to meet Arthur's eyes. "Sure."

"Dumbledore asked me to pass a message to you," Arthur said quietly. "He's going to have a mediwitch check Sirius over, and he'll bring him back to the house in a little while."

"Right," Remus said dully. "Mediwitch. House. Got it."

Arthur smiled kindly at him, squeezing his shoulder gently in commiseration. "It'll be alright, Remus. You did well in there."

"I'm not so sure I did," Remus said. "What if… They can't send him back there; they _can't_."

"Come on now," said Arthur. "Harry and Tonks are waiting for you."

It was nearly suppertime before Dumbledore turned up with Sirius. Remus had, in a fit of frustration and impatience, shooed everyone out of the house on Grimmauld Place. He knew they only wanted to wish Sirius the best, but from his vantage point at the trial, Remus was fairly sure that Sirius was not going to be up to dealing with a crowd of people, no matter how good their intentions.

He had fallen into a light doze by the drawing-room fire, the cooling mug of tea in his hand dangerously close to tipping to the rug, when they arrived.

At Dumbledore's quiet cough, Remus awoke with a start, slopping tea onto the rug anyway. "Sirius!" he said, and leapt up to embrace the other man. After a moment's hesitation, Sirius hugged him back diffidently, his eyes distant and slightly unfocused.

Remus pulled back slightly. "Sirius?" he asked. Glancing at Dumbledore, he said, "What's happened?"

Dumbledore shook his head. "Physically he's fine, Remus, but… It appears that returning to Azkaban has broken something in him," he said sorrowfully. "Sirius has withdrawn into himself."

"This… this is temporary, isn't it?" Remus looked frantically from Dumbledore to Sirius, who now was sitting contentedly in an armchair and smiling vaguely into the fire, and back again. "Isn't it?"

"No one knows," Dumbledore said. "Remus, I'm so very sorry about this. No one had any idea…" He gestured towards Sirius.

"I see," said Remus, although he didn't know how they could _not_ have foreseen something like this. "Could I just be alone with him then?"

"Of course," replied Dumbledore. As he turned to leave, he added, "You may, naturally, firecall me if you've a need."

"Thank you," whispered Remus, but the Headmaster was already gone.

Remus knelt by the armchair, one hand on Sirius' knee. "Sirius?" he asked, searching the distant grey eyes for some flicker of recognition. "Pads?"

Sirius slowly moved his gaze away from the dancing flames. "Remus," he said. "I thought I dreamed you here."

Something utterly excruciating wrenched at his heart, and Remus swore to himself that, no matter the outcome of the trial, there was no way he would allow Sirius to be returned to Azkaban. "Come on, Sirius," he said softly. "Let's get to bed."

"Am I tired?" said Sirius, puzzled. "Alright, then." He allowed himself to be led upstairs to their bedroom, one hand trailing along the banister as he looked around in wonder.

"You know, I think I've been here before," Sirius said. "Is this your house?"

Remus fought back tears. "No, it's yours."

"Oh."

Remus had to help him undress, gently helping Sirius out of the standard-issue prison garments he'd been allotted, and into bed. Climbing in on the other side of the bed, he pulled the covers snugly over top of them both.

Sirius curled up to him, instinctively snuggling into Remus' embrace. "Nice being here with you," he yawned. "You're very soothing, somehow." Before long, his breathing had become deep and regular as he fell asleep.

"Yeah," whispered Remus, burying his face in the tangled black hair to kiss the top of Sirius' head. He wasn't even remotely sleepy himself. "You sleep, Pads. I'll keep you safe."

Wrapping his arms tightly around the other man, Remus lay awake until the wee hours of the morning, hoping desperately that this wasn't going to be the last night he would be able to hold Sirius in his arms like this.


	13. Revenant Ch13

For disclaimers, et al, see first chapter.

A/N: Thank you to all who have been (sort of) patiently waiting for a continuation of this story. I had writer's block for six months (_not _fun!), while the girl I write with had a baby. All in all, she got the better end of the deal, don't you think?

**Chapter 13**

Remus woke abruptly to the sound of a low moan and a thrashing from the body next to him. He turned and pressed his lips to the feverish brow, murmuring soothing words until the sounds subsided.

He hadn't meant to fall asleep, had stayed awake until the first tendrils of dawn had begun to colour the horizon, but exhaustion had won him over. Now, the first golden rays of sun shone through the curtains, and Remus knew their time was limited.

As Remus sat up he felt the familiar weakness creep through his body. Tonight was a full moon. Would he have to bear it alone?

Leaving Sirius to a few more minutes of sleep, he crept to the bathroom and turned on the shower until the room filled with steam. As he stood under the thrumming water, an indescribable feeling of grief crept over him. The past two weeks had been so stressful, so hard on his heart he didn't know if he could make it through today. And certainly, if the verdict was against them, he didn't know if he could go on without Sirius.

Remus' knees weakened and he abruptly found himself sitting on the shower floor, hugging his knees to his thin chest. A low keening erupted from deep within and he rocked there at the bottom of the shower, for once allowing the grief to take over. For the past two weeks he had been too numb to feel anything, to let any emotion rise to the surface. From years of hiding, a life of keeping to himself, he had easily suppressed anything that threatened to erupt.

Not this time. This time the pain was so strong it could not be contained. The thrumming of his heart was painful against his chest, every tear was scalding on his cheeks, and the mere thought of life without Sirius threatened to tear his body apart. Every inch ached from the pain and low, desperate moans escaped him now, in-between the wracking sobs.

Footsteps sounded outside, and the door creaked open, but Remus couldn't stem the flow of tears.

He gazed through the haze and noted Sirius' outline.

"Are you alright?" Sirius' voice seemed far away, unreal, and yet there was a familiar lacing of concern in the otherwise detached tone.

The thought of losing Sirius' love caused him to choke back another sob.

Another tentative step came towards him. "R…Remus?"

"Please," Remus whispered hoarsely, "Sirius, go away." Not that that was what he wanted. More than anything he wanted to have Sirius hold him, tell him, with his characteristic confidence, that nothing could get Sirius Black down.

Another sob wracked his frame and the door was pulled open.

Sirius gazed down at him, his expression unreadable. With agonizing slowness he held out a hand. Unthinking, Remus took it and allowed Sirius to haul him to his feet.

It was as if time stood still. Sirius was getting splattered by the shower but didn't seem to notice. The droplets shone like miniature stars on his midnight lashes and Remus felt his body respond, though he tried to force the sudden rush of desire away.

A stream of water ran down Remus' cheek and with a jolt he felt Sirius' gentle finger wipe it away.

Though his expression was still neutral it was as though another force was at work, and Sirius bent towards him. Suppressing a groan, Remus leaned into the kiss, his lips captured by Sirius' own. His hands found there way to Sirius' shoulders, pulling him more firmly against him and he felt, with a certain amount of pride, that Sirius was not altogether unmoved.

Their tongues twisted and tangled, Remus pressing himself closer, allowing Sirius to feel his desire. After a moment, Remus felt Sirius move his hands down his wet back, a finger tracing the curve of his backside. A moan escaped Remus lips and Sirius captured the sound in his own.

It was a desperate kiss, Remus knew that, but still he clung to the small hope that perhaps Sirius was coming back to him already. With a subtle movement he rubbed himself against Sirius and was rewarded by a tiny sigh. He smiled into the lips and held Sirius even closer.

Sirius' hands ventured around to the front, and began a slow torment of his chest, tweaking his nipples into hard peaks, causing Remus' breath to come harder. Sirius' hand traveled lower and was so close to his hard member that Remus shifted impatiently to put himself into Sirius grip.

"Remus? Are you up there?"

_Tonks._

With a muffled curse, Remus gently pushed Sirius away from him, turning to shut off the water.

Though Sirius' cheeks were flushed and his body was still obviously aroused, that infernal expression remained soulless. The grey depths seemed fathomless and Remus wrenched his gaze away, grabbing a towel and covering himself up.

He was about to leave the room when Sirius grabbed his arm with surprising strength. "Remus?" His voice was soft, barely more than a whisper.

"Yes Sirius?"

"Do I love you?"

Remus turned away again, wrenching his arm out of Sirius' grip before he could see the fresh tears spilling down his cheeks.

No matter what it cost him, he would _not_ lose Sirius.

But a large part of him feared it was already too late.

They reentered the courtroom just as the clocks were striking nine.

It was, if possible, even more crammed with people than it had been the day before. Yet the atmosphere was strangely hushed for such a crowd. Flashbulbs still popped as Remus and Sirius threaded their way towards the front, and whispers and stares still followed their entrance, but the relative quiet was unearthly.

Remus noted with slight apprehension the two chairs set out for him and Sirius. The previous day, they had been separated. Wordlessly he sat down, motioning Sirius to take the other chair.

Amelia Bones inclined her head ever so slightly. "Good morning, gentlemen," she said. Her tone was carefully neutral. "I do appreciate your punctuality."

Sirius sat ethereally still, his expression only conveying a mild interest in the proceedings.

_Dear god_, Remus thought, eyeing him surreptitiously. He toyed nervously at the faint creases in his trousers.

"As you may well have guessed," Amelia continued, "this court, after much debate and consideration, has reached a verdict concerning the case of Sirius Black." She paused, sipping leisurely at a small glass of water while Remus tried vainly to stop fidgeting. "I see no reason to prolong this," she said. "Mr. Black. Mr. Lupin. Would you please rise."

For a moment Sirius did nothing, staring blankly ahead of him as Remus quickly stood up. Then, gingerly, he also rose.

"Mr. Black," said Amelia. "You were previously sentenced to life imprisonment in Azkaban for your part in the murders of Lily and James Potter, for treachery and for espionage. Furthermore, this life sentence was not completed."

Remus' stomach clenched.

Amelia's voice softened. "This court admits it was… misinformed… of the details at the time of the Potters' deaths. We deeply regret our error and wrongful accusations. You will of course, in time, receive due compensation for your time spent in Azkaban." Amelia paused, clearing her throat slightly. "In the meantime, Mr. Black, your sentence is hereby renounced. You are free to go."

All around them the courtroom erupted into jubilant shouts, cheers and whistles.

"Mr. Lupin," Amelia added over the noise. She nodded towards Sirius. "Take him home."

Remus gaped at her as the verdict sunk in.

Sirius was _free_.

He threw his arms exuberantly around Sirius, who staggered slightly under the assault. "We did it!" Remus yelled. "We did it! Sirius! You're a free man!"

"That's good, right?" Sirius asked. He still looked a bit vague, but Remus could swear the eyes were somehow brighter.

"Yes, it's good," Remus laughed. "It's _very_ good."

The firewhisky flowed freely at Grimmauld place that day. There were sounds of laughter, pats on backs and shouts of congratulations, yet Remus stood quietly against the cool wall, sipping from the smoking goblet gripped tightly in his hand. He had foregone the whisky, instead drinking his Wolfsbane potion and trying to force back the thrumming headache at the base of his spine. He had been remiss in taking the potion the last few days, with everything else taking priority and now he was worried that one little goblet would not be enough.

His eyes fell gently on Sirius, who was sitting on the sofa between Harry and Dumbledore, a silly smile on his face but that damned vacant look still in his eyes. _What the hell am I going to do?_ Remus thought despairingly, running his fingers through the stray lock that had fallen over his eyes. He thought of inviting someone to stay with them tonight. Thought of locking himself down in the cellar, but was too scared of Sirius wandering in on him.

The afternoon sun shone brightly through the window and warmed his shaking hands, and still he gazed at Sirius. Would he ever come out of his state? Would he ever have his Sirius back?

As though he knew he was being watched, Sirius turned, his eyes locking with Remus'. The moment lengthened into infinity, and suddenly Remus' shaking hands were aching to hold Sirius close, celebrate with him his new found freedom. He had actually moved an inch or so away from the wall when Sirius turned away to answer something Tonks had asked him.

_Should I go to him anyway?_

For the rest of the afternoon that thought was foremost in his mind. The well-wishers dwindled in number until finally it was just the two of them and Harry.

Sirius went to change out of his now crumpled suit, and Harry turned to Remus, concern evident in his green eyes. He couldn't fail to notice the shaking of Remus' slender frame, the slight sheen of perspiration that had broken on his brow.

"Do you want me to stay?" Harry asked, a steadying hand on Remus' shoulder.

"Thank you but no. It's still a couple of hours away. I…I can handle it."

Harry gave his shoulder a quick squeeze then turned to pick up his coat which had been draped across the back of the sofa. "Well, if you change your mind you know where to reach me. I can be here in seconds."

Remus smiled gratefully and watched as the boy, no the young _man_, strode out of the room, a bounce still in his step.

After a quick tidy of the room, Remus sat down next to the window, gazing into the gathering twilight. Though the moon had still not risen, his body gave an involuntary shudder. Remus closed his eyes, breathing deeply.

The scent of soap caused him to open them a few minutes later. The heat of the recent shower still emanated from Sirius' body, and Remus' rapidly heightening senses could make it out even from across the room. Sirius stood in the doorway, his body outlined by the light coming from the hallway behind. He gave a dashing smile, the kind Remus remembered from their carefree youth, and a pang of regret for those lost years tugged at his heart.

After shuffling uncertainly for a few moments, Sirius finally entered the room, taking the chair closest to Remus. "I want to thank you…" Sirius began softly.

Remus smiled gently. "For what?"

Sirius frowned, as if trying to remember some vital information, then smiled back. "For all you've done for me today, in the court room. I just…felt good knowing you did that….for me."

"You would have done the same for me."

Sirius' closeness was pushing him to his limits. His senses were overloading with the pure maleness of him, the heat, the slight sheen still on his skin, the droplets falling from his damp hair…

Sirius stared down at Remus trembling hands and took one gently in his own, caressing it with strong fingers. Remus was thrown back to another memory, another time when Sirius had lost his memories while in Azkaban, another moment when their hands had touched simply…because.

"You're shaking."

Remus had to smile at the gross understatement. "I know, its ok."

He raised his eyes once more, to gaze into the clear depths of Sirius' grey ones and was lost when Sirius leaned forward.

"I want to help you stop." Sirius whispered into his lips before claiming them tenderly with his own.

Remus closed his eyes once more, leaning into the kiss, trying to ignore the rising tremors. How much time did he have? Should he even do this? But surely Sirius knew what he wanted, didn't he?

Sirius plunged his tongue inside Remus mouth, tasting and teasing, eliciting a moan from the smaller man.

Remus pulled away fractionally, Sirius' breath still hot on his lips. "Do you know what you're doing?"

"I'm kissing you."

"Why?"

Sirius paused, another frown appearing as he thought over the question. A spark grew in the depths of those eyes as he took his hands away from Remus' and planted them firmly on either side of his face. "Because I love you."

"But you don't know…"

"I felt it this morning…when I saw you…I don't know if it's right or wrong, but you're mine. I think you always have been."

Remus gave up the fight as Sirius' mouth cam back down hard on his, his hands caressing his jaw then traveling down his shoulders to pull apart the shirt covering his chest. Whether he was weak from happiness or the coming moon, Remus didn't care. All he could do was lay back as Sirius nuzzled his neck, licked across his collar bone, then tenderly took a nipple into his mouth, teasing with his teeth.

Remus raised his hands to run down Sirius' back then mould themselves to the shape of his backside. He just now realized how much he had missed Sirius these last few weeks. Missed his laugh, missed his face…missed this.

He groaned when Sirius' hands fumbled at the buckle of his trousers. He raised his hips to aid in the downward slide of the material, his already hard member springing to meet Sirius eager grasp.

A sudden violent shudder raced its way through him and he dared to open his eyes. The moon was slowly rising into the sky.

With a swift movement, Remus pushed at Sirius, trying to sit up. He could now feel the racing of his blood in his veins, smell the life running through Sirius…animal thoughts.

"Sirius, you have to go." He ground out, pulling his clothes back on him.

"Re…what…why?" Sirius looked forlorn, lost, like a little boy.

"Please…"Remus begged him with his eyes to understand. You have to get as far away from here as you can. You're in danger…" Another shudder brought him to his knees. He must have been starting his transformation, for the look in Sirius' eyes was now one of terror.

With a last glance Sirius ran out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

Remus groaned. The potion was just enough for him to keep his mind…but the animal instinct had not been suppressed. With the whine of a wounded animal he transformed.

Sirius raced outside as fast as he could go, almost tripping in his haste.

Suddenly he bumped into something hard. He looked up into the cold eyes of Malfoy. His companions quickly shoved a dirty rag in Sirius' mouth and bound him at hands and feet.

"And now,' grinned Malfoy, "the final part of my plan comes to fruition."

… to be continued! …


End file.
